What is your most funny day/nite of the suspect or a partner?

**zpd307** · 05-13-06, 10:10 AM

Originally Posted by LawEnforcementForums

Umm, I moved my Lieutenant's patrol car a couple of blocks away the other night while he was in a bar hitting on chicks....then I pepper sprayed the grill for good measure.

oldie but goody!!!!

**zpd307** · 05-13-06, 10:16 AM

Originally Posted by 06AccordLX

I have a buddy down in CA thats a officer , He told me one time that a rookie who just passed FTO got her car "Stolen" . They tell her to meet somewhere so they can buy her lunch for gettin out of FTO. She goes there, and the SGT gets in the car and leaves. The SGT also put broken glass where her car was. So here she comes out, first day by her self and her car is stolen. She calls it in ( the whole dept is in on it ). By this time she is freaking out! So 10 minutes later comes a officer over the air saying hes found the car and its occupied. They rush over there and find out another sgt in the car and everyone is busting up laughing! I thought that was pretty funny to share!

thats priceless!!

**zpd307** · 05-13-06, 10:22 AM

Originally Posted by Big-Mo

I was on the Night Watch and was pretty slow out. I saw this car proceeding down a 4 lane road and using both lanes. I began to follow it and then I noticed the two guys up front kept looking back at me. After stopping at a stop sign, they proceeded on and then began changing driver while doing about 30 mph. It was SO FUNNY. They finally switched drivers and then I pulled them over. I determined that BOTH were inebriated BADLY and both blew over .20 and the Sgt couldn't believe I arrested two in one car. It wasn't more than three weeks later that while on 2nd watch on a sunday afternoon. I watched a car weave drastically with a female driver and a male on her right. I went to pull her over and she busted a stop sign and struck a parked car. As I was getting out, the passenger ran to the drivers side, scooted her over and jumped in and drove away. I could NOT believe it... I then got him stopped about 4 blocks down. Not ONLY were BOTH drunk and blew the tests and FAILED, I nailed him for leaving the scene plus an accident report, it was a LONG NIGHT!! Take care and Be Safe ALL!!

you the man! i had a drunk the other night leave town with his right signal on (no place to turn), pretty soon we're doing over 100 and hes in the opposite lane (2 lane road), still with his turn signal on. by the way hw was still revoked for his last dui

**TXCharlie** · 05-14-06, 05:03 PM

Originally Posted by nitestokker

Ground fighting with an EMU! They're smaller than ostriches, but very strong. Long story short, I got cut up pretty bad and ruined a uniform but he went to bird jail. My backup officers, including the supervisor, were laughing it up in Dispatch while I was calling for help.

My father-in-law executed his Emu's after an incident like that and confined them to the freezer (true story - He was thinking about setting up a emu farm, but soon came to his senses).

**121Traffic** · 05-14-06, 06:59 PM

Originally Posted by Cst.SB

I can't remember of my own stories, or that don't quite seem as fun as my friends. I once attended a call (utter threats) where the complainant was very attractive and about an hour or so later after we had cleared, we found her behind a warehouse on the back of a vette with her ankles on her boyfriends shoulders!!

A friend of mine who was in the British Prison Service told me a couple good stories.

One time he was working n the booking in area and some con had come in. Well, according to my friend they used to read the sentence as handed down by the courts, and occasionaly there would be an error, and the cons always hoped it would be a shorter sentence than was read out in court.

So, this one time a con comes in and like usual as officer read out the sentence. Joe Whatever you've been sentenced to 15 days. Well the con thinks he's just won the lottery because he had been sentenced to 15 years. He can barely contain himself, so he asks the officer, "Have I been sentenced to 15 days?". And the officer relpied, "Yes, you've been sentenced to 15 F-ing Christmas Days!!"

He said it was one of the funniest things he'd ever seen.

Now THAT is some funny ass shit!

**Sleuth** · 05-24-06, 05:02 PM

I was with Customs, and you can only import so much alcohol. One day, a traveller has to pour out about 2 gallons of Tequila in our special sink (pour it out, no penalty). A Customs Inspector, leaning on the sink, asks what he has. Traveler tells him, the inspector leans over the sink and yells "Juan, Taquila!" Then he tells the traveller the pipe runs back to Mexico, where they rebottle it and resell it!
We laughed, the traveller filed a complaint with his congressman about us selling liquor to Mexico! Those reports are no fun to write!

**babymines2004** · 05-24-06, 06:54 PM

About 5 years ago when I riding with my field training officer, 2 days fresh out of the academy, we recieved a armed party call. The call pertained to a naked female walking around the apartment complex with a knife in her hand, threatening the residents. The male officers jumped on the call as quickly as possible, you know why of course. My FTO and I made the scene with several other male officers but the woman could not be found. We looked everywhere and finally I saw this old man smiling and pointing to a door stating she stayed here. My FTO knocked on the door and she stated, I don't want any men in here because they are going to rape me. My FTO looked at me and I stated I was a woman and could she let me in. The woman opened the door still naked, she weight about 250lbs 5'9 and I realized she was mentally ill. I didn't know what to do so my FTO, also a Crisis Intervention Officer, trained to deal with mentally ill people coached me through it. Every piece of furniture in the house was turned over and the apartment was a mess. The woman proceeded to get in the tub and take a bath while I stood there. She babbled about getting rapped by some dogs, bears, cows and finally midgets. She was really religious because she kept quoting chapters from the bible. I got her to, get out of the tub, put her clothes, and come to the hospital with me by telling her that church members would come and visit her there. It was very hot outside but she insisted on wearing a fur coat, two pair of sweat pants, scarf, and red white & blue tennis shoes. One of the eight male officers at the door, thinking the woman would still be naked, took one disappointed look at her and stated "damn you made sure she has plenty clothes on, huh".