Frustrated...

**Illiy** · 08-06-09, 06:47 PM

Ok, I am curious... Did anyone have anyone in their family that just did NOT want them to be in law enforcement? I feel like my mom is trying to sabotage me!

I am finding that every time I have a meeting, test or anything relating to do with getting hired my mom is constantly fighting with me right before I have to go upping my anxiety. I have my polygraph in a couple of weeks and am seriously considering shutting my phone off 48 hours in advance so she can't call me!

Any advice?

**Terminator** · 08-06-09, 06:48 PM

Why is your mom against it?

**Second Chance** · 08-06-09, 06:52 PM

Maybe she is just a little scared of the thought of you being in law enforcement.

**Illiy** · 08-06-09, 06:54 PM

Originally Posted by Terminator

Why is your mom against it?

The danger factor.

**jmur5074** · 08-06-09, 07:25 PM

I know my mom doesn't like it but she's never come right out.

I think it would help letting your mom know that you have or will get excellent training to take care of yourself at work, and because your dedicated to the job you'll be focused and prepared to get the job done and come home at night. And also stress the fact that it's something you've wanted to do for however long, can't think or anything else you'd want to do, etc, etc.

**Five-0** · 08-06-09, 07:52 PM

Originally Posted by jmur5074

I know my mom doesn't like it but she's never come right out.

I think it would help letting your mom know that you have or will get excellent training to take care of yourself at work, and because your dedicated to the job you'll be focused and prepared to get the job done and come home at night. And also stress the fact that it's something you've wanted to do for however long, can't think or anything else you'd want to do, etc, etc.

For about two years after I got started my mom did not like what I was doing. She would constantly send me info on other jobs. I drew the line when she sent me a federal probation officer job. I flat out told her that got into this because I hated a desk and/or a cubicle. I believe she thinks I worked to hard in school to be doing this kind of work. She has backed off because she sees I love what I do. I also make out a lot better financially now than I did when I started out so that helps. She also knows that I'm so damn hard headed that once I'm set in something I will not be moved.

**Illiy** · 08-07-09, 12:25 AM

Originally Posted by Five-0

For about two years after I got started my mom did not like what I was doing. She would constantly send me info on other jobs. I drew the line when she sent me a federal probation officer job. I flat out told her that got into this because I hated a desk and/or a cubicle. I believe she thinks I worked to hard in school to be doing this kind of work. She has backed off because she sees I love what I do. I also make out a lot better financially now than I did when I started out so that helps. She also knows that I'm so damn hard headed that once I'm set in something I will not be moved.

I hope after I (fingers crossed) get hired she will back off, but I really am at a loss on how to handle her fighting with me before appointments. The flip side is I manage her business so it isn't like I can keep from telling her when I have an appointment because I need to clear the time off with her.

I get the feeling that it is just a mom thing to worry about their kids...

**pc830cop** · 08-09-09, 10:30 PM

She probably wants to see you safe from harm.

When I had a LOD shooting injury my then-fiance, mother, and then-future-mother-in-law wanted me to get out of the law enforcement field and have me return to shooting x- rays.

do whatever your hearts desire that makes YOU happy! BTW haven't seen you here in a while. welcome back. And do I get an invite to your academy graduation?

**lewisipso** · 08-10-09, 02:47 PM

My stepfather told me that if I tried being a cop he would kick my ass until my nose bled. (he hated cops) I told him I didn't do nosebleeds. Tell your mom that being a cop beats being a crack head, turn your phone off and go take your test. She'll eventually get over it as did my wife.

**matt86** · 08-10-09, 06:29 PM

When I came home and told my parents that I wanted to go into law enforcement they almost kicked me out of their house. They told me I was stupid and that I should do something where I could make money and support a family. They don't even dislike police, they are just naive to the world and I believe they were scared for me. It confused me for a while and put me in a horrible situation and I actually started to believe them for a while and considered forgetting about it. I'm very family oriented and the easy Monday-Friday 8-5 schedule seemed great!

As I moved up at my job at UPS however, I hated my job more and more. Yeah I could make 100k+ a year in management there in 5-6 years but I hated going to work every day and had no sense of accomplishment. I wanted to go out and defend those that are too weak or just not capable of defending themselves (like my parents). I continued working there while I paid for my school and got my associates degree in criminal justice and then as soon as I was old enough put in at a local PD I had been doing ride a longs with.

I've been there a little over two years now and have no regrets. Me and my parents now tell me they are proud of me and we get along fine. I still have some sore feelings towards them but realize they just didn't want me out in harms way. It's a decision you have to make for yourself and that nobody can make for you. I know it sounds cheesy, but all I can tell you is to follow your heart and everything will fall in place if it's meant to be.

Wow I typed alot... haha. If you need anything yell at me. I know where you're coming from.

**berserk** · 08-12-09, 03:50 AM

Originally Posted by Illiy

I have my polygraph in a couple of weeks and am seriously considering shutting my phone off 48 hours in advance so she can't call me!

Any advice?

I like your idea. Shut your phone off, call her afterwards.

**depusm12** · 08-15-09, 04:03 PM

My mom was against me getting on law enforcment when I first started but she wouldn't come right out and say anything. But she has mellowed and understands I love the job and couldn't do anything else. Now whenever we talk on the phone before I hang up she allways tells me to "be safe and have a good night".

**K9brando** · 08-16-09, 09:19 PM

My wife and I fought over it for a long time but she knew that I wouldn't be happy until I tried it. I tried it and the rest is history cause I've been a cop now for over ten years.

**ANI4ANI** · 08-17-09, 01:27 PM

Are you kidding? You have no idea why mom does not want her little daughter to enter an unsafe, demanding, under the microscope profession. She sees the news. Unless you were running away to work a crab fishing boat, or an ocean oil rig, which are many times more dangerous, you are selecting a serious potentially dangerous domestic occupation. Maybe when you are assaulted (because you will be) or injured somehow on the job, you'll understand why mom was and will always be concerned. She's mom, and mom's are protective. I always say, police work is not for the faint of heart and maybe she knows something about you, that you don't know about yourself.

**bayern** · 08-18-09, 08:54 AM

Yeah, my Wife. But, after 35 yrs, you would think she has gotten use to it by now. But, not really. Every time we go out and she sees the blue lights

its
"Why are they picking on him/her?" So she says, why don't you quit and retire - I says "you want to take another Cruise?" She says yes to (you name it) and I tell her I got to go to work tomorrow.

Yes, she is a good wife and never complained about what I did as long as I come home SAFE. She quit worrying when I was in Vietnam (x2), saying, "I'll worry when I get the knock on the door at midnight."

**deputysykes** · 08-18-09, 10:59 AM

Well, I'd tell you to lock her up in a closet for 48 hours prior to your polygraph, but.....that might cause an issue on your polygraph.

BE CONFIDENT. While in the profession you are going to have an uncountable amount of things that try to bring you down. Be confident in what you feel is right, in this case a career in law enforcement, and learn to ignore outside influences that try to alter your beliefs.