Welcome to the APBWeb.
Results 1 to 18 of 18
  1. #1
    Big Sexy's Avatar
    Big Sexy is offline Not your mothers BIG SEXY
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    12-09-05
    Location
    In Denial
    Posts
    671
    Rep Power
    617750

    Exclamation GILLIGAN and the Seven Deadly Sins

    The "Seven Deadly Sins of Gilligan's Island" theory is quite simple. Each of the seven characters on the island represents each of the seven deadly sins.

    The Professor = PRIDE (you know he thought he was better than the others), Any man who can make that much crap on a deserted island probably should be concieted, but that doesn't make it okay. He never could fix that damn boat. His knowledge of Science and Technology makes him feel more important than the others. That's why he gets his own hut.
    Mary Ann = ENVY (of Ginger, mainly), She tried to be as slutty as she could be, but everyone knows that Ginger was the most popular one there. She's the one who has to do most of the "Women's Work". She is definitely jealous of Ginger.
    Ginger = LUST (obvious - look at her), If you watch the show very carefully, it's pretty obvious that she was going after the Professor AND Gilligan. What a whore. She gets her way by using her body. And her false… eyelashes.
    Mr. Howell = GREED (obvious), What kind of person takes a trunk full of money on a three-hour cruise? Definately the most obvious sinner.
    Mrs. Howell = SLOTH (she never did anything), Can anybody honestly name one damned thing she did for anyone while they were on the island. Honestly!!?? What a waste of space. She's living off of her husband's money and never really joins in the chores on the island.
    Skipper = ANGER and GLUTTONY (obvious), The skipper is not only the fatest guy there, but he can't go five minutes without hitting Gilligan over the head with his hat. He deserves double sinnage if anyone does. He's obviously eating better than the others and he flies off of the handle faster than anyone else. Because he's guilty of both, he has to live with:
    Gilligan = The DEVIL (ever notice that he always wears red?), Think about it. Who keeps them on the damned island for eternity? The devil. The island is named for him. Definately Satan and the ISLAND is HELL!! Who could mess up that much if he weren't the Devil? No one could do that by accident.
    The Real Story

    But none of them are right! Let BIG SEXY tell you why…. (You may never watch it the same way again). Here is the real reason they're never leaving the island! THERE IS NO ISLAND!

    It's True! Gilligan is one of us! He's a spawn of Satan! What does BIG SEXY mean, you may be asking. It's called Gilligan's Island isn't it? Of course it is. That's because he's got the power. If the Skipper had the power, as is generally thought, it would have been called "Skipper's Island". But it's not. Because the Skipper never left the Minnow alive.

    What?!!

    No kidding. The Skipper died on the Minnow. So did everyone else. They're never leaving the island because the six people on the boat all drowned in the storm. The "Island" is really a little spot in hell.

    But there are seven people on the Island! Wrong! There are six people. All of them guilty of seven deadly sins. Gilligan is not a person. He's the Devil. He's listening to the advice of Sun Tsu, the great Chinese Military Philosopher and using an ancient tactic to avoid suspicion-playing dumb. Gilligan is without a doubt the smartest one on the island.

    No Way!

    Way! He's the one in the red shirt, isn't he? On Star Trek, that would mean certain death. But on Gilligan's Island, it's the sign of the Devil. It's his job to keep them just out of reach of salvation.
    Don't Be Afraid To Fail.

    No Tengas Miedo Al Fracaso.



  2. #2
    BEK's Avatar
    BEK
    BEK is offline Lieutenant
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    01-02-06
    Location
    Minnesota
    Posts
    2,101
    Rep Power
    3397458
    someone has been smoking some pretty hard shit to come up with that


  3. #3
    Big Sexy's Avatar
    Big Sexy is offline Not your mothers BIG SEXY
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    12-09-05
    Location
    In Denial
    Posts
    671
    Rep Power
    617750
    Quote Originally Posted by BEK320 View Post
    someone has been smoking some pretty hard shit to come up with that
    Puff, Puff, Pass, Puff, Puff, Pass.
    Don't Be Afraid To Fail.

    No Tengas Miedo Al Fracaso.



  4. #4
    countybear's Avatar
    countybear is offline BDRT - Baby Daddy Removal Team
    Verified LEO
    Super Moderator
    Join Date
    01-18-07
    Location
    Louisiana
    Posts
    6,512
    Rep Power
    4611628
    I used to listen to Black Sabbath in reverse on 78 speed when I watched Gilligan's Island too... but only after I was trippin' on a bad hit. Ever notice how when Gilligan's hat was off, his hair used to stick up like horns?

    All I can say is.. wow.. bitchin'...

    "The American Republic will endure until the day Congress discovers that it can bribe the public with the public's money."
    - Alexis de Tocqueville, Democracy in America

    Tell me not, Sweet, I am unkind,
    That from the nunnery
    Of thy chaste breast and quiet mind
    To war and arms I fly.
    - Lovelace

    The opinions expressed by this poster are wholly his own, and should never be construed to even remotely be in representation of his employer, its agencies or assigns. In fact, they probably fail to be in alignment with the opinions of any rational human being.

  5. #5
    Gatekeeper's Avatar
    Gatekeeper is offline Enjoy your stay
    Join Date
    12-11-06
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    134
    Rep Power
    57457
    Well there goes five minutes of my life I can't get back.

  6. #6
    Willowdared's Avatar
    Willowdared is offline Bendy not Breaky
    Join Date
    04-26-06
    Location
    San Diego
    Posts
    6,177
    Rep Power
    1401351
    Mmmmmmmokay.

    Molly Weasley makes Chuck Norris eat his vegetables.

    Do not puff, shade, skew, tailor, firm up, stretch, massage,
    or otherwise distort statements of fact.
    FBI Special Agent Coleen Rowley

  7. #7
    Terminator's Avatar
    Terminator is offline BANNED
    Join Date
    12-03-05
    Location
    None of your business
    Posts
    16,064
    Rep Power
    0
    Are you drunk?

  8. #8
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
    Supporting Member Lvl 1
    Join Date
    04-29-06
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    18,093
    Rep Power
    4329092
    Hmm, Gilligan did always seem to be the one to destroy any chance they had of getting off of the island......




  9. #9
    jmur5074's Avatar
    jmur5074 is offline Moderator
    Premium Lifetime Member
    Verified LEO
    Site Moderator
    Join Date
    12-04-05
    Location
    Minnesota
    Posts
    9,051
    Rep Power
    6232623
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    Hmm, Gilligan did always seem to be the one to destroy any chance they had of getting off of the island......
    Please don't give him any encouragement
    No one has greater love than this, to lay down ones life for ones friends - John 15:13

    "The Wicked Flee When No Man Pursueth: But The Righteous Are Bold As A Lion".

    We lucky few, we band of brothers. For he who today sheds his blood with me shall be my brother.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~
    The opinions, beliefs, and ideas expressed in this post are mine, and mine alone. They are NOT the opinions, beliefs, ideas, or policies of my Agency, Police Chief, City Council, or any member of my department.

  10. #10
    lewisipso's Avatar
    lewisipso is offline Injustice/Indifference/In God we trust
    Supporting Member Lvl 3
    Verified LEO
    Super Moderator
    Join Date
    02-02-07
    Location
    Louisiana
    Posts
    14,725
    Rep Power
    6936012
    ???????!!!!!!!!!!!
    Do not war for peace. If you must war, war for justice. For without justice there is no peace. -me

    We are who we choose to be.

    R.I.P. Arielle. 08/20/2010-09/16/2012


  11. #11
    Big Sexy's Avatar
    Big Sexy is offline Not your mothers BIG SEXY
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    12-09-05
    Location
    In Denial
    Posts
    671
    Rep Power
    617750
    Quote Originally Posted by Terminator View Post
    Are you drunk?
    C'mon Term. Since when has BIG SEXY needed to be drunk?
    Don't Be Afraid To Fail.

    No Tengas Miedo Al Fracaso.



  12. #12
    Big Sexy's Avatar
    Big Sexy is offline Not your mothers BIG SEXY
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    12-09-05
    Location
    In Denial
    Posts
    671
    Rep Power
    617750
    Quote Originally Posted by jmur5074 View Post
    Please don't give him any encouragement
    Naw, by all means, encourage him.
    Don't Be Afraid To Fail.

    No Tengas Miedo Al Fracaso.



  13. #13
    Hannibal's Avatar
    Hannibal is offline Zombie Killin' Sheepdog
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    05-27-06
    Location
    Detroit
    Posts
    2,847
    Rep Power
    2067665
    Wow, that's deep BIG. Wait a minute; this is more strange than I thought....

    I was on the island where part of that show was filmed (the intro where they showed an actual island). Does this mean that I have been to hell and back?

    Hmmmmm....

    "Stupid should hurt."

  14. #14
    Ducky's Avatar
    Ducky is offline Enforcer General
    Supporting Member Lvl 3
    Join Date
    12-05-05
    Location
    Handbasket, enroute to somewhere hot.
    Posts
    11,108
    Rep Power
    7439165
    Wow, that must've been some pretty laced stuff you took off the border hopper, Big! Can't believe you're not sharing...

    Quote Originally Posted by Gatekeeper View Post
    Well there goes five minutes of my life I can't get back.
    It took you 5 minutes to read that? Or did you have to re-read it because it only made baked sense to begin with?
    \\
    ` ` ` ` < ` )___/\
    `` ` ` ` (3--(____)
    "...but to forget your duck, of course, means you're really screwed." - Gary Larson
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtN1YnoL46Q


  15. #15
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
    Supporting Member Lvl 1
    Join Date
    04-29-06
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    18,093
    Rep Power
    4329092
    Quote Originally Posted by jmur5074 View Post
    Please don't give him any encouragement
    Oops. I guess I won't mention anything about the fact that they had a never ending supply of food and they never grew facial hair....




  16. #16
    Jenna's Avatar
    Jenna is offline sheep
    Premium Lifetime Member
    Join Date
    06-11-06
    Posts
    24,376
    Rep Power
    4817858
    This clip shows the true nature of Gilligan's Island:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X13ri...elated&search=

    Last edited by Jenna; 02-18-07 at 12:12 PM.

  17. #17
    Hannibal's Avatar
    Hannibal is offline Zombie Killin' Sheepdog
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    05-27-06
    Location
    Detroit
    Posts
    2,847
    Rep Power
    2067665
    I often wondered how one could make a radio out of a coconut, but couldn't fix a hole in a boat.

    "Stupid should hurt."

  18. #18
    Ducky's Avatar
    Ducky is offline Enforcer General
    Supporting Member Lvl 3
    Join Date
    12-05-05
    Location
    Handbasket, enroute to somewhere hot.
    Posts
    11,108
    Rep Power
    7439165
    If you were the Professor, would you fix the boat? I mean, one of those days, either Ginger or Mary Ann would crack. Personally, I think Mary Ann beat Ginger hands down. Who wants to deal with the constant upkeep of Ginger? Mary Ann may even fix breakfast the next morning.
    Last edited by Ducky; 02-18-07 at 01:11 PM.
    \\
    ` ` ` ` < ` )___/\
    `` ` ` ` (3--(____)
    "...but to forget your duck, of course, means you're really screwed." - Gary Larson
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtN1YnoL46Q


 

 

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •