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  1. #1
    BEB
    BEB is offline Banned
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    What's the funniest thing you've seen lately?

    With so many snowbound and some stuck at work let's share some amusing tales to pass the time.

    I'll start it off with a critter one...

    There's a small farmstead I drive by each day with about a 20 acre pasture along the road. In there are three bay horses....and an old billy goat.

    Usually the goat is off on a mound on the other side of the pasture, pointedly ignoring the horses, passing cars and anything else it deems unworthy of it's attention. The few times I have seen this lot mixed together they're similarly disinterested in each other.

    I have no idea what started it, but apparently the horses managed to get this goat's...er, goat... today. I saw the horses standing in a small group out in the middle of the grass and wondered what they were doing there. Just as I slowed down for a better look I saw the goat come charging around from the far side of the trio.

    Now I've seen dogs herd sheep and cattle, even seen dogs herd goats. I've seen some skilled horses cutting cattle with a cowboy sitting on top claiming credit for the job. But this is the first time in my life I've ever seen a goat herding horses!

    That old goat wasn't letting those horses leave for anything. Every time one went to break away he'd sprint over to stop them and he was doing a fine job of it. He was kicking up dirt each time he shifted to the side like a baseball catcher trying to keep up with wild pitching machine.

    Ok, so mine was pretty much a "had to be there". I'll think back if I have a better one. Do you have one to share?

  2. #2
    Lazy Fed's Avatar
    Lazy Fed is offline Curmudgeon
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    I seen some truck driver's "package" the other day.....
    dulce et decorum est pro patria mori


    Quote Originally Posted by Resident Smart Ass
    Life is to short not to experience Lazy Fed
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    O RLY?? YA RLY NO WAI!!!!

    The incoherent statements given in my posts DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency or any other person for that matter. They are MY PERSONAL DELUSIONAL FANTASIES and I accept sole responsibility as such as I am either drunk or stressed out of my mind.

  3. #3
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
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    I found this while cleaning out a food pantry at work a few days ago.






  4. #4
    lewisipso's Avatar
    lewisipso is offline Injustice/Indifference/In God we trust
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    SOG was called out for a "high risk" search warrant by our Narcotics team. Being briefed we were told there were some Aryan Brotherhood in the target trailer along with shotguns and rifles. We were pumped. Briefed on the target and it's location which most team members knew quite well once the location was given we map out a plan. We load up and drive 30+ miles in full gear in my friends old Dodge van for the surprise effect. We arrive and bail out each in position in the stack for our assigned jobs. Our ram guy, who is as crazy as they come, was on the porch and at full cock when one of the narcotic agents began blowing his horn like mad and yelling we were one trailer off target. (NO COMMUNICATION. We knew we were where we had been told to go) Now that the gig is up we bail off the non target porch and run thru ankle deep mud to the target house all out of order and struggling to keep a formation. I see my ram guy humping in the front and when he hits "dry" land he leaps from ground level to the porch level with the ram. When his feet hit the porch, which is just plywood, they go straight up in the air, he lands flat on his back, and slides across the porch to the exterior wall. He hits the wall with his feet with so much force and so much momentum the impact stands him straight up next to the door. Without missing a step he swings back and rams the door just as we catch up with him. We were laughing so hard we could barely yell "Sheriffs Office search warrant!"
    Once every room was cleared the home owner was provided a copy of the warrant. After reading it he stated "Aryan Brotherhood!" "If I was Brotherhood do you think I'd have him sitting here smoking a joint and drinking a beer?" Sure enough on one couch there was a black guy sitting there with his hands up. A joint smoking in one hand and a beer in the other saying "The only brother in this house in me." Definitely an ATFU moment.
    Do not war for peace. If you must war, war for justice. For without justice there is no peace. -me

    We are who we choose to be.

    R.I.P. Arielle. 08/20/2010-09/16/2012


  5. #5
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    The other day at work we were walking the parking lots and we walked by a car with its door open. We walked up said hello to see if anyone was around. No one was, the door was just left open. We looked in the car and then in the door. Sitting in the door was their pot and brightly colored pot bowl plain as day just sitting there in the open door. We laughed for 5 mins before we could do anything. Sometimes stupidity is amusing.
    Thereís a promise I need you to make
    While Iím gone you take care of the love
    And Iíll deal with the hate.

    Donít worry about me; Iíll be all right
    Just care for your children and sleep tight
    Iíll keep you safe on my watch tonight
    ~
    On My Watch Tonight - Mike Corrado

  6. #6
    Jenna's Avatar
    Jenna is offline sheep
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    Quote Originally Posted by lewisipso View Post
    I see my ram guy humping in the front and when he hits "dry" land he leaps from ground level to the porch level with the ram. When his feet hit the porch, which is just plywood, they go straight up in the air, he lands flat on his back, and slides across the porch to the exterior wall. He hits the wall with his feet with so much force and so much momentum the impact stands him straight up next to the door. Without missing a step he swings back and rams the door just as we catch up with him. We were laughing so hard we could barely yell "Sheriffs Office search warrant!"
    Once every room was cleared the home owner was provided a copy of the warrant. After reading it he stated "Aryan Brotherhood!" "If I was Brotherhood do you think I'd have him sitting here smoking a joint and drinking a beer?" Sure enough on one couch there was a black guy sitting there with his hands up. A joint smoking in one hand and a beer in the other saying "The only brother in this house in me." Definitely an ATFU moment.
    Awesome! Do you work for Reno 911?

  7. #7
    lewisipso's Avatar
    lewisipso is offline Injustice/Indifference/In God we trust
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    No, but we laughed as long as it took for him to get the mud off his ass. And then got pissed off at Narcotics.
    Do not war for peace. If you must war, war for justice. For without justice there is no peace. -me

    We are who we choose to be.

    R.I.P. Arielle. 08/20/2010-09/16/2012


 

 

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