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  1. #1
    dapples's Avatar
    dapples is offline Swamp Kitty
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    For the Women of LEF

    A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...


    A set of screwdrivers, A cordless drill, and A black lace bra..



    A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... One friend who Always makes her Laugh... And one Who lets her cry...

    A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...


    A good piece of furniture Not previously owned by Anyone else in her family...

    A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE Eight matching plates, Wine glasses with stems, And a recipe for a meal that will Make her guests feel honored.


    A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... A feeling of control over Her destiny...


    EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... How to fall in love Without losing herself...


    EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... How to quit a Job


    Break up with a lover


    And confront a friend without ruining the friendship



    EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... When to try harder... And WHEN TO WALK AWAY.


    EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... That she can't change The length of her calves, The width of her hips, or The nature of her parents...


    EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... That her childhood May not have been Perfect..but Its over...


    EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... What she would and Wouldn't Do for love or more...

    EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... How to live alone... Even if She doesn't like it...


    EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... Whom she can trust, Whom she can't, And why she shouldn't Take it personally...


    EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... Where to go... Be it to her best friend's kitchen table.. Or a charming inn in the woods... When her soul needs soothing...


    EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... What she can and can't accomplish In a day... A month.. And a year...

  2. #2
    conalabu is offline Grasshopper
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    EVERY WOMEN SHOULD KNOW...




    Her place.
    And Shepards we shall be,
    for thee, My Lord, for thee,
    Power hath descended forth from Thy hand,
    That our feet may swiftly carry out Thy Command.
    So we shall flow a river forth to Thee
    And teeming with souls will it ever be.
    In Nomine Patris, Et Filli, Et Spiritus Sancti.

  3. #3
    dapples's Avatar
    dapples is offline Swamp Kitty
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    Quote Originally Posted by conalabu View Post
    EVERY WOMEN SHOULD KNOW...




    Her place.
    Very true...............in The House?












    OR




    The Senate?
    Last edited by dapples; 04-03-07 at 07:59 PM.

  4. #4
    Lazy Fed's Avatar
    Lazy Fed is offline Curmudgeon
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    I thought you were going to post my picture for all the ladies to drool over
    dulce et decorum est pro patria mori


    Quote Originally Posted by Resident Smart Ass
    Life is to short not to experience Lazy Fed
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    O RLY?? YA RLY NO WAI!!!!

    The incoherent statements given in my posts DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency or any other person for that matter. They are MY PERSONAL DELUSIONAL FANTASIES and I accept sole responsibility as such as I am either drunk or stressed out of my mind.

  5. #5
    Willowdared's Avatar
    Willowdared is offline Bendy not Breaky
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    Quote Originally Posted by dapples View Post
    A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
    Extra batteries in every size.
    Molly Weasley makes Chuck Norris eat his vegetables.

    Do not puff, shade, skew, tailor, firm up, stretch, massage,
    or otherwise distort statements of fact.
    FBI Special Agent Coleen Rowley

  6. #6
    kay88's Avatar
    kay88 is offline Sergeant
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    Quote Originally Posted by PDawg View Post
    Extra batteries in every size.
    LOL, they are almost always needed at the most random times. I concur...
    Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.
    ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

  7. #7
    Jenna's Avatar
    Jenna is offline sheep
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    Quote Originally Posted by dapples View Post
    Very true...............in The House?
    OR

    The Senate?
    In the White House!


  8. #8
    Piggybank Cop's Avatar
    Piggybank Cop is offline Nobody important.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna View Post
    In the White House!

    Not on a God damn bet.



    You have great taste in men; you hang around here; however you have no taste in women.

    Awoman president OK fine; just not that one.



    Have a nice day Jenna.

    We are the thin blue line
    between you
    and all the money in the world.

    And no you can't have any.

  9. #9
    BabyGirl is offline Rookie
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    Quote Originally Posted by Piggybank Cop View Post
    Not on a God damn bet.



    You have great taste in men; you hang around here; however you have no taste in women.

    Awoman president OK fine; just not that one.



    Have a nice day Jenna.

    I don't like Hillary either, I do like the post about the extra batteries though!!!!

  10. #10
    CelticCop's Avatar
    CelticCop is offline The Dark Lord
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    You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to dapples again.


    Ain't that some shit.... You know I've got you again as soon as some other funny MFs will post something.
    "Where's your towel Arthur?" -Ford Prefect

    "You! On your knees!" -Green Jello

    Some take delight in the carriages a rollin'
    and some take delight in the hurley and the bowlin',
    I take delight in the juice of the barley,
    and courtin' pretty fair maids in the morning bright and early...


    "You are, without a doubt, the worst pirate I've ever heard of..." Cmdre. Norrington "Ah, but you have heard of me." Capt. Jack Sparrow

    Warning my statements do not reflect the policies, procedures or views of my agency. As a matter of fact, they think I'm just as nuts as you do, so shove it and blow it out of your fart tube.

  11. #11
    Trojan 42's Avatar
    Trojan 42 is offline Retired Ninja
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    There must have been a woman in the White House already! How would they keep it clean otherwise?
    To be born an Englishman, is to be a winner in the Lottery of Life.



    I've Talked the Talk and I've Walked the Walk, now I Sit the Sit!

    It's not until you look at an Ant through a magnifying glass on a sunny day, that you realise just how often they burst into flames for no reason!

  12. #12
    BEB
    BEB is offline Banned
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    Last edited by BEB; 04-04-07 at 03:18 PM. Reason: bizarre reference to the war of 1812 made more sense before I slept

  13. #13
    dapples's Avatar
    dapples is offline Swamp Kitty
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    Quote Originally Posted by CelticCop View Post
    You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to dapples again.


    Ain't that some shit.... You know I've got you again as soon as some other funny MFs will post something.

    merci...gracious....or as would say "thank ya thank ya very much" hehehe

  14. #14
    Cheech Guest
    Brad the title of this thread goes for you too,.

  15. #15
    Michelle's Avatar
    Michelle is offline Civilian
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    Those are nice Dapples! Thank you!

  16. #16
    dapples's Avatar
    dapples is offline Swamp Kitty
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    Quote Originally Posted by Michelle View Post
    Those are nice Dapples! Thank you!
    Thanks...I am glad you enjoyed them

  17. #17
    RPDP44's Avatar
    RPDP44 is offline uh huh..suuure
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    Got all that.. even the extra batteries! But.. do the dishes really have to match? Oh..wait! my paper ones do!
    Light moves faster than sound. That's why some people look intelligent..until they speak.

  18. #18
    mavriktu's Avatar
    mavriktu is offline Patrol Sgt.
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    Quote Originally Posted by RPDP44 View Post
    Got all that.. even the extra batteries! But.. do the dishes really have to match? Oh..wait! my paper ones do!


    Dont worry so do Dapples'

  19. #19
    cidp24a's Avatar
    cidp24a is offline Master Officer
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    I am not sure that we own a good piece of furniture that was not previously owned by one of our family members......But I have all the rest covered...
    "Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History"



    "All history becomes subjective; in other words there is properly no history, only biography."

  20. #20
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
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    I've got them all covered - the only thing I would add would be a trustworthy mechanic.




 

 
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