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Thread: For the Women of LEF
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04-03-07, 07:20 PM #1
Swamp Kitty
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For the Women of LEF
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
A set of screwdrivers, A cordless drill, and A black lace bra..
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... One friend who Always makes her Laugh... And one Who lets her cry...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
A good piece of furniture Not previously owned by Anyone else in her family...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE Eight matching plates, Wine glasses with stems, And a recipe for a meal that will Make her guests feel honored.
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... A feeling of control over Her destiny...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... How to fall in love Without losing herself...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... How to quit a Job
Break up with a lover
And confront a friend without ruining the friendship
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... When to try harder... And WHEN TO WALK AWAY.
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... That she can't change The length of her calves, The width of her hips, or The nature of her parents...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... That her childhood May not have been Perfect..but Its over...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... What she would and Wouldn't Do for love or more...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... How to live alone... Even if She doesn't like it...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... Whom she can trust, Whom she can't, And why she shouldn't Take it personally...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... Where to go... Be it to her best friend's kitchen table.. Or a charming inn in the woods... When her soul needs soothing...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... What she can and can't accomplish In a day... A month.. And a year...
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04-03-07, 07:45 PM #2
Grasshopper
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EVERY WOMEN SHOULD KNOW...
Her place.And Shepards we shall be,
for thee, My Lord, for thee,
Power hath descended forth from Thy hand,
That our feet may swiftly carry out Thy Command.
So we shall flow a river forth to Thee
And teeming with souls will it ever be.
In Nomine Patris, Et Filli, Et Spiritus Sancti.
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04-03-07, 07:46 PM #3
Swamp Kitty
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Very true...............in The House?
Originally Posted by conalabu
OR
The Senate?
Last edited by dapples; 04-03-07 at 07:59 PM.
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04-03-07, 07:53 PM #4
Curmudgeon
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I thought you were going to post my picture for all the ladies to drool over
dulce et decorum est pro patria mori
Originally Posted by Resident Smart Ass
___ ___ ___{o,o} {-.-} {0,0}|)__) |)_(| (__(|-"-"- -"-"- -"-"-O RLY?? YA RLY NO WAI!!!!
The incoherent statements given in my posts DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency or any other person for that matter. They are MY PERSONAL DELUSIONAL FANTASIES and I accept sole responsibility as such as I am either drunk or stressed out of my mind.
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04-03-07, 10:32 PM #5
Bendy not Breaky
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Extra batteries in every size. Originally Posted by dapples
Molly Weasley makes Chuck Norris eat his vegetables.
Do not puff, shade, skew, tailor, firm up, stretch, massage,
or otherwise distort statements of fact.FBI Special Agent Coleen Rowley
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04-03-07, 11:09 PM #6
Sergeant
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LOL, they are almost always needed at the most random times. I concur... Originally Posted by PDawg
Extra batteries in every size.Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
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04-03-07, 11:12 PM #7
sheep
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In the White House! Originally Posted by dapples
Very true...............in The House?
OR
The Senate? 
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04-03-07, 11:45 PM #8
Nobody important.
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Not on a God damn bet. Originally Posted by Jenna
In the White House!
You have great taste in men; you hang around here; however you have no taste in women.
Awoman president OK fine; just not that one.
Have a nice day Jenna.
We are the thin blue line
between you
and all the money in the world.
And no you can't have any.
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04-03-07, 11:52 PM #9
Rookie
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I don't like Hillary either, I do like the post about the extra batteries though!!!! Originally Posted by Piggybank Cop
Not on a God damn bet.
You have great taste in men; you hang around here; however you have no taste in women.
Awoman president OK fine; just not that one.
Have a nice day Jenna.
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04-04-07, 01:13 AM #10
The Dark Lord
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You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to dapples again.
Ain't that some shit.... You know I've got you again as soon as some other funny MFs will post something."Where's your towel Arthur?" -Ford Prefect
"You! On your knees!" -Green Jello
Some take delight in the carriages a rollin'
and some take delight in the hurley and the bowlin',
I take delight in the juice of the barley,
and courtin' pretty fair maids in the morning bright and early...
"You are, without a doubt, the worst pirate I've ever heard of..." Cmdre. Norrington "Ah, but you have heard of me." Capt. Jack Sparrow
Warning my statements do not reflect the policies, procedures or views of my agency. As a matter of fact, they think I'm just as nuts as you do, so shove it and blow it out of your fart tube.
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04-04-07, 03:47 AM #11
Retired Ninja
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There must have been a woman in the White House already! How would they keep it clean otherwise?
To be born an Englishman, is to be a winner in the Lottery of Life.
I've Talked the Talk and I've Walked the Walk, now I Sit the Sit!
It's not until you look at an Ant through a magnifying glass on a sunny day, that you realise just how often they burst into flames for no reason!
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04-04-07, 04:19 AM #12
Banned
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Last edited by BEB; 04-04-07 at 03:18 PM. Reason: bizarre reference to the war of 1812 made more sense before I slept
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04-04-07, 08:37 AM #13
Swamp Kitty
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Originally Posted by CelticCop
merci...gracious....or as
would say "thank ya thank ya very much" hehehe
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04-04-07, 08:26 PM #14Cheech Guest
Brad the title of this thread goes for you too,.
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04-04-07, 09:13 PM #15
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Those are nice Dapples! Thank you!
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04-05-07, 08:42 AM #16
Swamp Kitty
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Thanks...I am glad you enjoyed them Originally Posted by Michelle
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04-05-07, 08:50 AM #17
uh huh..suuure
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Got all that.. even the extra batteries! But.. do the dishes really have to match? Oh..wait! my paper ones do!
Light moves faster than sound. That's why some people look intelligent..until they speak.
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04-05-07, 10:07 AM #18
Patrol Sgt.
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Originally Posted by RPDP44
Got all that.. even the extra batteries! But.. do the dishes really have to match? Oh..wait! my paper ones do!
Dont worry so do Dapples'
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04-05-07, 10:19 AM #19
Master Officer
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I am not sure that we own a good piece of furniture that was not previously owned by one of our family members......But I have all the rest covered...
"Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History"
"All history becomes subjective; in other words there is properly no history, only biography."
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04-05-07, 10:42 AM #20
Thrives in sunshine
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I've got them all covered - the only thing I would add would be a trustworthy mechanic.
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