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  1. #1
    Tony's Avatar
    Tony is offline Banned
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    Talking How to Make a Woman Happy

    It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:

    1. a friend
    2. a companion
    3. a lover
    4. a brother
    5. a father
    6. a master
    7. a chef
    8. an electrician
    9. a carpenter
    10. a plumber
    11. a mechanic
    12. a decorator
    13. a stylist
    14. a sexologist
    15. a gynecologist
    16. a psychologist
    17. a pest exterminator
    18. a psychiatrist
    19. a healer
    20. a good listener
    21. an organizer
    22. a good father
    23. very clean
    24. sympathetic
    25. athletic
    26. warm
    27. attentive
    28. gallant
    29. intelligent
    30. funny
    31. creative
    32. tender
    33. strong
    34. understanding
    35. tolerant
    36. prudent
    37. ambitious
    38. capable
    39. courageous
    40. determined!
    41. true
    42. dependable
    43. passionate
    44. compassionate

    WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:

    45. give her compliments regularly
    46. love shopping
    47. be honest
    48. be very rich
    49. not stress her out
    50. not look at other girls

    AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

    51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
    52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
    53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

    IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:

    54. Never to forget:
    * birthdays
    * anniversaries
    * arrangements she makes


    <><><><><><><><>




    HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

    1. Show up naked
    2. Bring food
    3. Bring beer

  2. #2
    snuffy2202's Avatar
    snuffy2202 is offline JUST ANOTHER TEQUILA SUNRISE
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    PREACH ON, BROTHER MAN!!

  3. #3
    ipso608's Avatar
    ipso608 is offline S W A M P M A F I A !
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    That's Right!
    "People too weak to follow their own dreams will always find a way to discourage yours!"

    " A Society That Wages A War Against Its' Police, Had Better Learn To Make Friends With Its' Criminals."


    www.myspace.com/bufordhebert

  4. #4
    gozling's Avatar
    gozling is offline the gene pool could use a little chlorine
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    umm i noticed in all that there was no mention of a remote control....

    *shrugs shoulders*
    http://www.allpoetry.com/Grunts%20Girl

    We dallied under
    Vine maples and sapling alders
    Searched for lady slippers
    But instead
    Found blackberry riots and
    Desiccated branches

    An old skid road
    Brought ghost ferns and
    Hollows filled with
    Skunk cabbage
    While waves wrapped
    Intricate lacings of weeds
    'Round mule spinners

    His cyanotic eyes
    Were hard enough to make
    The sun turn tail and
    Tender enough to attract me
    To his world of illusion

  5. #5
    snuffy2202's Avatar
    snuffy2202 is offline JUST ANOTHER TEQUILA SUNRISE
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    Good point, gozling! Must have remote!

  6. #6
    bayern's Avatar
    bayern is offline Officer First Class
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    Add: Don't take away the credit cards!

  7. #7
    Willowdared's Avatar
    Willowdared is offline Bendy not Breaky
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    Molly Weasley makes Chuck Norris eat his vegetables.

    Do not puff, shade, skew, tailor, firm up, stretch, massage,
    or otherwise distort statements of fact.
    FBI Special Agent Coleen Rowley

  8. #8
    Tony's Avatar
    Tony is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by PDawg View Post
    OMG!!!! Hide that before the wife sees it, geez!!!!!

  9. #9
    dispatcher's Avatar
    dispatcher is offline Rookie
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    How to make a Dispatcher happy:
    1) !!!!! NO ASSISTS!!!! ;-)
    2) No car stops while en route to that Priority 1 job
    3) If you have an MDT..use it!
    4) Sudden Car Pursuits are a no-no!
    5) Responding when radio tries to raise you
    6) Understanding that dispatchers don't create the jobs (no matter how silly they may seem). We may feel the same way as you about them.
    7) Tell us when you've added/subtracted a partner or changed cars
    8) Tell us when you've been suddenly been put on a D/A ,or otherwise not available
    9) When you let us know you are available/ or have completed an assignment
    10) Communication,Communication,Co mmunication! *We love you*

  10. #10
    Resident Smart Ass's Avatar
    Resident Smart Ass is offline I ASK THE QUESTIONS AROUND HERE
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    Don't you just hate it when someone's balls are hidden so well, they can't seem to find it themselves ~ RSA

    You can't avoid gossip & rude words from
    people. You can't please everybody. But remember, they wouldn't bother if you meant nothing.


    FOLLOW RSA ON TWITTER (IF YOU'RE GOING TO FOLLOW ME, PLEASE SEND ME A MESSAGE ON HERE WITH YOUR O/R USERNAME AND TWEET USERNAME SO I'LL KNOW WHO I'M ACCEPTING OTHERWISE YOU WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED!)
    https://twitter.com/RESIDENTSMARTAS



    A PINT OF SWEAT SAVES A GALLON OF BLOOD ~ PATTON



  11. #11
    blackcamaro8895's Avatar
    blackcamaro8895 is offline Master Officer
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    lies, all lies.

  12. #12
    Illiy is offline Corporal
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    Quote Originally Posted by PDawg View Post
    LMAO....

  13. #13
    Resident Smart Ass's Avatar
    Resident Smart Ass is offline I ASK THE QUESTIONS AROUND HERE
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    Quote Originally Posted by Illiy View Post
    LMAO....
    I don't see anything funny missy
    Don't you just hate it when someone's balls are hidden so well, they can't seem to find it themselves ~ RSA

    You can't avoid gossip & rude words from
    people. You can't please everybody. But remember, they wouldn't bother if you meant nothing.


    FOLLOW RSA ON TWITTER (IF YOU'RE GOING TO FOLLOW ME, PLEASE SEND ME A MESSAGE ON HERE WITH YOUR O/R USERNAME AND TWEET USERNAME SO I'LL KNOW WHO I'M ACCEPTING OTHERWISE YOU WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED!)
    https://twitter.com/RESIDENTSMARTAS



    A PINT OF SWEAT SAVES A GALLON OF BLOOD ~ PATTON



  14. #14
    Illiy is offline Corporal
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    Quote Originally Posted by Resident Smart Ass View Post
    I don't see anything funny missy
    Thats funny... I did....


  15. #15
    Resident Smart Ass's Avatar
    Resident Smart Ass is offline I ASK THE QUESTIONS AROUND HERE
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    Quote Originally Posted by Illiy View Post
    Thats funny... I did....

    Don't you just hate it when someone's balls are hidden so well, they can't seem to find it themselves ~ RSA

    You can't avoid gossip & rude words from
    people. You can't please everybody. But remember, they wouldn't bother if you meant nothing.


    FOLLOW RSA ON TWITTER (IF YOU'RE GOING TO FOLLOW ME, PLEASE SEND ME A MESSAGE ON HERE WITH YOUR O/R USERNAME AND TWEET USERNAME SO I'LL KNOW WHO I'M ACCEPTING OTHERWISE YOU WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED!)
    https://twitter.com/RESIDENTSMARTAS



    A PINT OF SWEAT SAVES A GALLON OF BLOOD ~ PATTON



  16. #16
    Tony's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Resident Smart Ass View Post

  17. #17
    lewisipso's Avatar
    lewisipso is offline Injustice/Indifference/In God we trust
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    Quote Originally Posted by Resident Smart Ass View Post
    Great Ceasers Ghost son!!!! If I was built like that I'd freakin retire and stay home everyday!!
    Do not war for peace. If you must war, war for justice. For without justice there is no peace. -me

    We are who we choose to be.

    R.I.P. Arielle. 08/20/2010-09/16/2012


  18. #18
    10-42Adam's Avatar
    10-42Adam is offline Major
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    So true
    Calm Like A Bomb...

    A pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. An optimist sees opportunity in every difficulty.
    -Winston Churchill

  19. #19
    Donut Aficionado's Avatar
    Donut Aficionado is offline The Hillbilly Warlord
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    I found it was easier to give the woman a toy and let her make herself happy.
    Insert witty comment and disclaimer here.

  20. #20
    Illiy is offline Corporal
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    Quote Originally Posted by lewisipso View Post
    Great Ceasers Ghost son!!!! If I was built like that I'd freakin retire and stay home everyday!!
    I am confused... what would you do with yourself at home??

 

 
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