toss this question around...

[Ender]

Guy proposes to girl, she accepts.

they break up a few months later. what should happen with the ring?

my opinion: if he breaks up with her, his loss on that front. if she breaks it off with him, she should give the ring back.



no, this isn't applicable to me personally, another thread on another board got me thinking

[Illiy]

It depends who breaks it off...

Guy...she keeps the ring

Girl... she gives it back

[MacLean]

Thpppppppppt, sorry Illiy.

I remember the answer to this in law class. The ring is a contract.

It goes back to the guy if the deal doesn't go through, unless it was given as a gift.

Don't propose on her birthday.

[Illiy]

Thpppppppppt, sorry Illiy.

I remember the answer to this in law class. The ring is a contract.

It goes back to the guy if the deal doesn't go through, unless it was given as a gift.

Don't propose on her birthday.

Pifffffft... The ring is a gift :P

[Buttercup]

Thpppppppppt, sorry Illiy.

I remember the answer to this in law class. The ring is a contract.

It goes back to the guy if the deal doesn't go through, unless it was given as a gift.

Don't propose on her birthday.

Or Christmas.


Even if the law didn't protect the ring-giver, IMO the ring should be returned regardless of who breaks off the engagement. However, if the breakup is amicable and the guy is generous and tells the woman to keep the ring, then I think it's perfectly acceptable for her to keep it unless it's an heirloom ring from the guy's family.

[MacLean]

I proposed my first time on Christmas.

She still has the ring, such as it was.

Live and learn!

[Buttercup]

I proposed my first time on Christmas.

She still has the ring, such as it was.

Live and learn!

I returned a ring, it didn't seem right to keep it after I broke it off. Live and learn, indeed.

[JAYBIRD33081]

It depends who breaks it off...

Guy...she keeps the ring

Girl... she gives it back

i would agree with this if i broke it off i wouldnt expect the ring back

[Willowdared]

The RULES according to Emily Post

Weddings ~ Engagements
The Etiquette of Broken Engagements

If an engagement is broken, the bride should immediately return the ring to her former fiancé.

The only “but” in this case is if the ring is a family heirloom of the bride’s. She should then keep the ring.

Some argue that the ring should not be returned to the fiancé if he was the one to initiate the break-up—rather than a mutual decision to call it quits. It makes more sense to return it. Why keep a painful reminder of the end of an engagement just to be spiteful? It’s better to take the high road and move on.

The bride should also return any other presents of value her fiancé has given her, and he should return her gifts as well.

[countybear]

The intended bride loses two rings:

1. The one worn on her finger,

2. and the one worn in the intended groom's nose.

[Ender]

The RULES according to Emily Post

Weddings ~ Engagements
The Etiquette of Broken Engagements

If an engagement is broken, the bride should immediately return the ring to her former fiancé.

The only “but” in this case is if the ring is a family heirloom of the bride’s. She should then keep the ring.

Some argue that the ring should not be returned to the fiancé if he was the one to initiate the break-up—rather than a mutual decision to call it quits. It makes more sense to return it. Why keep a painful reminder of the end of an engagement just to be spiteful? It’s better to take the high road and move on.

interesting post...i'm surprised my view can be changed so quickly.

if thats the rules, thats the rules...so much the better for guys the world over

[MacLean]

There you have it Ender, the rule of etiquette and the rule of law.

Go get your ring back!

[Ducky]

The intended bride loses two rings:

1. The one worn on her finger,

2. and the one worn in the intended groom's nose.

If her aim is good, upon return of the engagement ring, it should become the ring in his nose. Retrieval by a doctor may be necessary.

[Ender]

There you have it Ender, the rule of etiquette and the rule of law.

Go get your ring back!

<--- has never bought an engagement ring.

doesn't look like i will be any time soon either

[Willowdared]

interesting post...i'm surprised my view can be changed so quickly.

if thats the rules, thats the rules...so much the better for guys the world over

I think an etiquette book should be right next to the dictionary on the home bookshelf.

There's some good shit in there.

[Doc_Holliday]

<--- has never bought an engagement ring.

doesn't look like i will be any time soon either

Do they use rings in civil unions E?



In my experience, the best for both parties is to end things amicably, sell the ring and blow the 2 months pay at the nudie bar a'la Al Bundy.

[Jenna]

The Ring should be cast into the fires of Mount Doom in Mordor to prevent it from enslaving anyone else.

[PapaBear]

Who Gets the Ring?

Although etiquette rules that an engagement ring should be returned when a wedding is called off regardless of who broke the engagement, the legal system has differing opinions on this issue.

Some of the circumstances that determine if an engagement ring has to be returned include where you live, how you received the engagement ring, and who broke the engagement.

Conditional Gift States

Many courts look at an engagement ring as a conditional gift that is given in contemplation of marriage. If there is no marriage, then the engagement ring needs to be returned.

Iowa
Kansas
Michigan
New Jersey
New Mexico
New York
Pennsylvania
Wisconsin

The courts also have held in these states that the reasoning for no-fault divorces holds for no-fault broken engagements so an engagement ring should always be returned regardless of who decided to call off the engagement.


Implied Conditional States

In these locales, if the guy breaks the engagement, he won't get the ring back. If he doesn't break the engagement, he can request its return.

California

Unconditional Gift States

Other courts have held the belief that an engagement ring is an unconditional gift and so it doesn't need to be given back.

Montana

Family Heirloom Engagement Rings

If you are considering giving a family heirloom engagement ring, legal experts recommend having a prenuptial agreement that lists who will keep the engagement ring in the event of a break up.

http://marriage.about.com/od/rings/a/ringreturn.htm

[countybear]

The Ring should be cast into the fires of Mount Doom in Mordor to prevent it from enslaving anyone else.

Oh, my... Jenna made a funny. I mean a real, honest to goodness belly laughable funny!

What in the hell is this world coming to?

REP!!

[Hannah87]

I would give the ring back. Under both circumstances- if i broke it off or if he did. Or... maybe i'd sell it........