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View Poll Results: What SHould Erin Do?!

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  • Leave him and don't worry about him

    16 69.57%
  • Leave him and date the other guy

    6 26.09%
  • other....suggestions

    3 13.04%
Multiple Choice Poll.
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  1. #1
    Ivory's Avatar
    Ivory is offline Grrr I hate not working for a jail.....
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    I Need Advice People

    Back at the begining of the year me and my boyfriend seperated becuase he was flirting with our MARRied co-worker. And I have already lost love for him when he was fucking around in october yet i stayed with him....i know....dumbass.....

    well I was pregnant at the time, so I had my baby on march 7th and a month after we got back together to try it out again....but it's been 3 months and I am not happy, I am only in this for the girls right now, and i Have meet another guy who tickles my fancy.

    My boyfriend proposed to me but i cut it off becuz I wasn't happy and now we have been trying to work it out for a week now and I am HATING life....

    I wanna break it off but I don't wanna hurt him or my kids.

    What should I do?
    Life is a fleeting memory,
    It come and goes,
    But one thing will always remain.
    That is History.
    ~Erin~

  2. #2
    mack's Avatar
    mack is offline Officer Resource Offical Auctioneer
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    If your not happy, DO NOT MARRY HIM! Get out before it turns to hate. It will be tough but if your not happy it will end up hurting the kids in the long run. You don't want to end up getting a divorce and feeling you've wasted all that time. Don't do it to you, to him, or to the kids. Why would you want to ruin your life living a lie with someone you don't love.

    My dad, I miss him every day.

    Originally Posted by Wolven
    Life is too short to wear unsexy underwear.


    I am a female!!!!! LMAO

    Be who you are and say what you feel.....
    Because those that matter...don't mind...
    And those that mind...don't matter

  3. #3
    Terminator's Avatar
    Terminator is offline BANNED
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    Move on. The 'staying in it for the kids' idea sounds good in theory, until you find out years later that it caused a buttload of emotional damage to your kids because of the hell they had to deal with seeing how there mom and dad treat each other.

  4. #4
    Jenna's Avatar
    Jenna is offline sheep
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    Leave him regardless of what you do with the other guy. You and your kids will be happier without the drama.

  5. #5
    keith720's Avatar
    keith720 is offline Finely Aged
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    I agree with the advice that's been given.
    For the morning will come. Brightly will it shine on the brave and true, kindly upon all who suffer for the cause, glorious upon the tombs of heroes. Thus will shine the dawn.

    Winston Churchill

  6. #6
    Ducky's Avatar
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    Good advice given. I married my ex because I was pregnant and lived in hell till I managed to divorce him. My daughter remembers the arguments, vaguely, but fortunately sees a healthy relationship in my marriage to Mr Ducky. I just hope I didn't scar her too badly by trying to tough it out instead of getting the hell out.
    \\
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    "...but to forget your duck, of course, means you're really screwed." - Gary Larson
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtN1YnoL46Q


  7. #7
    jcsdscott's Avatar
    jcsdscott is offline The short minister
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    You know in your heart that he won't make you happy because he isn't committed to you. You and the children will be better off without him or any drama that he may bring. Love yourself and the kids, and if it is meant to happen the "one" will come to you.
    Romans 8:28-31

    "Anima Sana In Corpore Sano"

    The opinions, beliefs, and ideas expressed in this post are mine, and mine alone. They are NOT the opinions, beliefs, ideas, or policies of my Agency, Sheriff, County Board, or any member of my department.

  8. #8
    cajunguy's Avatar
    cajunguy is online now I LOVE my ParaOrd .45ACP!
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    If you ain't happy BEFORE you marry him, you ain't gonna be happy AFTER.

    Trust me on that one. Been there, done that. (And I didn't even get a t-shirt.)

    Git while the gittin's good.


    .
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    "Heaven doesn't want us,
    and Hell's afraid we'll take over!!"
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  9. #9
    Death Detective is offline I work for the victim
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    Get the hell out of Dodge, NOW!!!!!!!! Get a good attorney and make sure he pays child support. If you think you don't need the money put it in the bank for the kids future, after all it is their money. Regardless of how you feel and write this down, there will be a test later, Guilt don't last..and there is life after a break up. As far as a new guy, go damn slow and get to know him very, very well before sex or any comittment.

  10. #10
    Ender's Avatar
    Ender is offline Three Sheets...
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    Quote Originally Posted by Terminator View Post
    Move on. The 'staying in it for the kids' idea sounds good in theory, until you find out years later that it caused a buttload of emotional damage to your kids because of the hell they had to deal with seeing how there mom and dad treat each other.
    Agreed, 100%.
    --

    Ender

    "And if the band you're in starts playing different tunes, I'll see you on the dark side of the moon..."

  11. #11
    pgg's Avatar
    pgg
    pgg is offline Damnit, I'm hungry again.
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    I have to agree with the above posts.

  12. #12
    Hannah87's Avatar
    Hannah87 is offline Giggidy... Giggidy..
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    I agree with the above.

    If you stay with him for your children, and they see that YOU are not happy in the future... they won't be happy either.

    Good luck.
    May you rest in peace Daddy and may you never hurt again. I love you and miss you and can't wait to see you again.

    12/12/44- 2/26/09

  13. #13
    Shoestring's Avatar
    Shoestring is offline Please dont check the trunk...
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    Go with your heart. Yeah it may be tough on the kids but it all works out in the end. You need to be happy
    Somebody Please, what the hell is that smell?

    "The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'."

    The views, opinions, stupid off the cuff comments, mouthy, obnoxious, thoughtless, etc etc etc are not always or even some of the time the belief of my department, so bugger off!

  14. #14
    nsb22's Avatar
    nsb22 is offline Crazilicious
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    Quote Originally Posted by mack View Post
    If your not happy, DO NOT MARRY HIM! Get out before it turns to hate. It will be tough but if your not happy it will end up hurting the kids in the long run. You don't want to end up getting a divorce and feeling you've wasted all that time. Don't do it to you, to him, or to the kids. Why would you want to ruin your life living a lie with someone you don't love.

    I couldn't have said it better myself!!! I tried the whole staying together for the kids bullshit, til my daughter said something to me that hurt.

    I was reading to her one night and she said to me "Daddy, you're lots of fun. So is mom. But together you guys just don't work out. You fight alot."

    That was when I realized what I was doing and finally made the right choice.

    You know what you need to do.


    "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear."
    -- Ambrose Redmoon

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  15. #15
    2 Blue 4 U's Avatar
    2 Blue 4 U is offline Retired NYPD
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    All the advice posted is great, I will just add don't leave him for another guyu, leave him because it is the right thing to do. If things work out with the other guy, great.

    Just keep in mind, why let someone make you miserable when you can be miserable by yourself. Less bullcrap that way! If you are not happy, he eventually won't be either.

    Go with what your heart and gut are telling you!

  16. #16
    dapples's Avatar
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    You aleady know he is a liar and a cheat.......what else do you need?
    Next, concentrate on taking care of your children and yourself.
    When you are able to stand on your own feet......you will attract the right person.....jumping from one man to another is not the answer....what is important are your children....and what they learn by your example....

    Good luck!!!

  17. #17
    Ivory's Avatar
    Ivory is offline Grrr I hate not working for a jail.....
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    Thank you all for the advice. That Just proves to me even more that I need to leave, my friends have been telling me the same thing and the other guy that I had met even said that he married young and got a divorce and told me not to do it. He is 30 and OMG he is fucking sexy hot!!!!!!!!! He's really nice and doesn't care that I have kids. I have talk to him and he said that he wants to date me but he is just worried that I am going to leave him and go back to greg and I told him that I'm not going to do that after all the shit that I have been through with Greg and besides. This is the last time that greg is giving me a chance he doesn't wanna do it all a 3rd time.

    Now my main problem is when to drop it off with him, because it's only been a week since I said lets give it a 3rd try and apparently it's not working out........and next weekend we are suppose to go to my dad's house for a family get-together but I don't know if I can handle him for another week. It's all already starting to turn to hate and I have not been nice to him the past week or now.

    I still Confused but i know what I need to do, I just don't know when
    Life is a fleeting memory,
    It come and goes,
    But one thing will always remain.
    That is History.
    ~Erin~

  18. #18
    nsb22's Avatar
    nsb22 is offline Crazilicious
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    I'd say do it asap, but I'm not really one to talk as it took me 2 years to do what needed to be done.


    "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear."
    -- Ambrose Redmoon

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  19. #19
    Jenna's Avatar
    Jenna is offline sheep
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    I'd do it ASAP. Why drag it out? Just explain politely that it's best for everyone involved if you discontinue the relationship.

  20. #20
    2 Blue 4 U's Avatar
    2 Blue 4 U is offline Retired NYPD
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ivory View Post
    Now my main problem is when to drop it off with him, because it's only been a week since I said lets give it a 3rd try and apparently it's not working out........and next weekend we are suppose to go to my dad's house for a family get-together but I don't know if I can handle him for another week. It's all already starting to turn to hate and I have not been nice to him the past week or now.

    I still Confused but i know what I need to do, I just don't know when
    Why live in a charade, it is not healthy for neither one of you and especially not for the kids. It will not be easy but you need to talk it out with him, I am sure he can feel it is not working too. Do this before you really hate each other and do or say something you may regret.

 

 
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