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  1. #1
    mavriktu's Avatar
    mavriktu is offline Patrol Sgt.
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    Columbo meets Obama

    DICSLAIMER: It is very late and I haven't checked this on Snopes,so if it is false----mea culpa.

    A different slant on the Democratic Party's messiah.



    Columbo still scratching his head.

    Ah . . . Sorry to bother you Mr. Obama, Sir. . .



    Excuse me Mr. Obama, I mean Senator Obama, Sir. Um . . . I know

    you're busy, and important and stuff. I mean running for president is

    very important and -- ah -- I hate to bother you Sir. I will only take

    a minute. Ok Sir?



    See, I have these missing pieces that are holding me up, and I

    was wondering Sir, if you could take time out of your busy schedule

    and help me out. You know, no big deal, just some loose ends and things.



    Hey, you have a nice place here! The wife sees houses like this

    on TV all the time and says boy she wishes she had digs like this you know?

    Is that painting real? Really? Wow. I saw something like that in a

    museum once!



    Oh, sorry Sir. I didn't mean to get off the track. So if you

    could just help me out a minute and give me some details, I will get

    right out of your way. I want to close this case and maybe take the

    wife to Coney Island or something. Ever been to Coney Island Sir? No? I didn't think so.



    Well, listen, anyway, I can't seem to get some information I

    need to wrap this up. These things seem to either be "Not released" or

    "Not available." I'm sure it's just an oversight or glitch or

    something, so if you could you tell me where these things are -- I --

    I have them writt en down here somewhere -- oh wait. Sorry about the

    smears. It was raining out. I'll just read it to you.



    Could you please help me find these things Sir?



    1. Occidental College records -- Not released

    2. Columbia College records -- Not released

    3. Columbia Thesis paper -- "Not available"

    4. Harvard College records -- Not released

    5. Selective Service Registration -- Not released

    6. Medical records -- Not released

    7. Illinois State Senate schedule -- Not available

    8. Your Illinois State Senate records -- Not available

    9. Law practice client list -- Not released

    10. Certified Copy of original Birth certificate -- Not released

    11. Embossed, signed paper Certification of Live Birth -- Not

    released

    12. Record of your baptism -- Not available



    Oh and one more thing Senator, I can't seem to find any

    articles you published as editor of the Harvard Law Review, or as a

    Professor at the University of Chicago. Can you explain that to me Sir?



    Oh but, hey -- listen! I know you're busy! If this is too much

    for you right now -- I mean -- tell you what. I'll come back

    tomorrow. Give you some time to get these things together, You know? I

    mean, I know you're busy. I'll just let myself out. I'll be back

    tomorrow. And the day after. . .



    What's that Senator? Who wants to know these things?



    We the People of the United States of America . You know, the

    ones that vote.

  2. #2
    Ryan's Avatar
    Ryan is offline Bust a move
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    "The inherent vice of Capitalism is the unequal sharing of its blessings; the inherent vice of Socialism is the equal sharing of its miseries." -Winston Churchill

  3. #3
    Bob Loblaw's Avatar
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    Yes. I'm sure he didn't actually graduate from college. Or register with the Selective Service. Or was actually born. Barack Obama is a ghost who descended from the depths of hell to destroy America.

    The man has been campaigning for 20 months...if there was something to "find out", it would be found out by now. Especially if it were something as rudimentary as "he's not a natural born US citizen" or "he didn't really graduate from college" or "he never registered with the Selective Service."
    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna
    he (Obama) doesn't have a birth certificate because he wasn't born, he was created in a Muslim witch's cauldron!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    I must admit, there have been few pieces of meat I've ever jammed into my mouth that have been as satisfying as Bob's.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gecko45 "The Mall Ninja"
    Vietnam still shudders when it hears the name of a an assasin so skillful and deadly, he is remembered decades later
    Reca is the best thing since sliced bread!

  4. #4
    Bob Loblaw's Avatar
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    Obama's Medical Records (if you can believe that commie pinko liberal rag the Chicago Sun Times!!! They probably made this up because they're so far in the tank for bHo!!!):

    http://blogs.suntimes.com/sweet/2008..._informat.html
    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna
    he (Obama) doesn't have a birth certificate because he wasn't born, he was created in a Muslim witch's cauldron!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    I must admit, there have been few pieces of meat I've ever jammed into my mouth that have been as satisfying as Bob's.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gecko45 "The Mall Ninja"
    Vietnam still shudders when it hears the name of a an assasin so skillful and deadly, he is remembered decades later
    Reca is the best thing since sliced bread!

  5. #5
    Bob Loblaw's Avatar
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    Obama Illinois State Senate Record (totally manufactured..probably not real):
    http://www.nytimes.com/imagepages/20...A_GRAPHIC.html
    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna
    he (Obama) doesn't have a birth certificate because he wasn't born, he was created in a Muslim witch's cauldron!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    I must admit, there have been few pieces of meat I've ever jammed into my mouth that have been as satisfying as Bob's.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gecko45 "The Mall Ninja"
    Vietnam still shudders when it hears the name of a an assasin so skillful and deadly, he is remembered decades later
    Reca is the best thing since sliced bread!

  6. #6
    Bob Loblaw's Avatar
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    Information on Obama's work as a lawyer : http://www.suntimes.com/news/politic...-law17.article
    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna
    he (Obama) doesn't have a birth certificate because he wasn't born, he was created in a Muslim witch's cauldron!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    I must admit, there have been few pieces of meat I've ever jammed into my mouth that have been as satisfying as Bob's.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gecko45 "The Mall Ninja"
    Vietnam still shudders when it hears the name of a an assasin so skillful and deadly, he is remembered decades later
    Reca is the best thing since sliced bread!

  7. #7
    Bob Loblaw's Avatar
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    Obama's Certification of Live Birth: http://images.dailykos.com/images/us...ertificate.jpg
    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna
    he (Obama) doesn't have a birth certificate because he wasn't born, he was created in a Muslim witch's cauldron!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    I must admit, there have been few pieces of meat I've ever jammed into my mouth that have been as satisfying as Bob's.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gecko45 "The Mall Ninja"
    Vietnam still shudders when it hears the name of a an assasin so skillful and deadly, he is remembered decades later
    Reca is the best thing since sliced bread!

  8. #8
    Jenna's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bob Loblaw View Post
    Yes. I'm sure he didn't actually graduate from college. Or register with the Selective Service. Or was actually born. Barack Obama is a ghost who descended from the depths of hell to destroy America.


    Actually he did admit he was born on another planet!

    YouTube - Obama: Born On Krypton


  9. #9
    Terminator's Avatar
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    Hold up everyone. Bob's linking liberal sites like the Daily Kos, and New York Times for reference to prove this wrong. It must be true.

  10. #10
    mack's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Terminator View Post
    Hold up everyone. Bob's linking liberal sites like the Daily Kos, and New York Times for reference to prove this wrong. It must be true.


    LMAO

    My dad, I miss him every day.

    Originally Posted by Wolven
    Life is too short to wear unsexy underwear.


    I am a female!!!!! LMAO

    Be who you are and say what you feel.....
    Because those that matter...don't mind...
    And those that mind...don't matter

  11. #11
    TacticalII's Avatar
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    Good job Loblaw, way to SMASH those nasty rumors! I think you've effectively swung an additional 3 votes Obama's way!!!

















































  12. #12
    Bob Loblaw's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TacticalII View Post
    Good job Loblaw, way to SMASH those nasty rumors! I think you've effectively swung an additional 3 votes Obama's way!!!
    Every vote counts! You should've seen my wife convincing 275's wife last night to vote for Obama! That's 4 votes in less than 12 hours! We're making a difference!!!!!!!!!
    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna
    he (Obama) doesn't have a birth certificate because he wasn't born, he was created in a Muslim witch's cauldron!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    I must admit, there have been few pieces of meat I've ever jammed into my mouth that have been as satisfying as Bob's.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gecko45 "The Mall Ninja"
    Vietnam still shudders when it hears the name of a an assasin so skillful and deadly, he is remembered decades later
    Reca is the best thing since sliced bread!

  13. #13
    TacticalII's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bob Loblaw View Post
    Every vote counts! You should've seen my wife convincing 275's wife last night to vote for Obama! That's 4 votes in less than 12 hours! We're making a difference!!!!!!!!!

  14. #14
    Jenna's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bob Loblaw View Post
    Every vote counts! You should've seen my wife convincing 275's wife last night to vote for Obama! That's 4 votes in less than 12 hours! We're making a difference!!!!!!!!!

  15. #15
    Bob Loblaw's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna View Post
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Meet my new wallpaper on my work computer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!
    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna
    he (Obama) doesn't have a birth certificate because he wasn't born, he was created in a Muslim witch's cauldron!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    I must admit, there have been few pieces of meat I've ever jammed into my mouth that have been as satisfying as Bob's.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gecko45 "The Mall Ninja"
    Vietnam still shudders when it hears the name of a an assasin so skillful and deadly, he is remembered decades later
    Reca is the best thing since sliced bread!

  16. #16
    Captain America's Avatar
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    You know where the horn on the unicorn is going after Obama gets elected? Yep , right up every taxpayer's ass. " Time for Change ". Change will be all that is in your pocket.
    SI VIS PACEM PARA BELLUM

    "It's a great life. You risk your skin catching killers and the juries turn them loose so they can come back and shoot at you again. If your honest , your poor your whole life. And , In the end , you wind up dying all alone on some dirty street. For what? For nothing. For a tin star."
    -Ex-Sheriff Martin Howe to Will Kane in "High Noon"

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    Renniger-Richards-Griswold-Owens

  17. #17
    121Traffic's Avatar
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    While I am no huge McCain fan, there is just something about Obama that makes me uneasy. I am not as educated as I should be about the candidates, I do think that Obama seems just a bit too slick. Say what you want about him, but you can't dispute that he has really just kind of come out of nowhere. I remember how big a deal he was when he was elected to Illinois' senate...and I remember that that was just a few years ago. I dunno...he just seems very, very manufactured. I know all politicians are manufactured to a large extent, but the fact that Obama seems that way just makes it all the more unusual and unsettling. I bought a book about him the other day and it really is eye-opening. Granted, the author is a self-admitted conservative, but I chose his book because he takes a distrusting, yet still respectful tone. He starts off the book condemning the people that rest their arguments with stuff like Obama supposedly not respecting the flag, being a secret Muslim, etc. He states that he puts no credence into these arguments against Obama, and rests his arguments (mostly) on Obama's political record. The book is called "The Case Against Obama: The Unlikely Rise and Unexamined Agenda of the Media's Favorite Candidate" if anyone wants to check it out. So far, I have found it (obviously) biased towards the conservative, but it is mostly free of empty emotive rhetoric.

    Again...given his views, I don't know how any cop can support him. Disregard hot buttons like abortion, gun ownership, etc. I'm thinking more along the lines of constitutional law, search and seizure, etc. I shudder to think what his Supreme Court picks will be.
    "If anything worthwhile comes of this tragedy, it should be the realization by every citizen that often the only thing that stands between them and losing everything they hold dear... is the man wearing a badge." -- Ronald Reagan, in the wake of the deaths of 4 CHP troopers in the Newhall Incident, 1970

    The opinions given in my posts DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency. They are my personal opinions only, thereby releasing my agency of any liability, or involvement in anything posted under the username "121Traffic" on O/R.

  18. #18
    Pudge's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 121Traffic View Post
    While I am no huge McCain fan, there is just something about Obama that makes me uneasy. I am not as educated as I should be about the candidates, I do think that Obama seems just a bit too slick. Say what you want about him, but you can't dispute that he has really just kind of come out of nowhere. I remember how big a deal he was when he was elected to Illinois' senate...and I remember that that was just a few years ago. I dunno...he just seems very, very manufactured. I know all politicians are manufactured to a large extent, but the fact that Obama seems that way just makes it all the more unusual and unsettling.

    Again...given his views, I don't know how any cop can support him. Disregard hot buttons like abortion, gun ownership, etc. I'm thinking more along the lines of constitutional law, search and seizure, etc. I shudder to think what his Supreme Court picks will be.

    You just said exactly what I've been thinking. I know I owe it to myself to educate myself more on the candidates and issues, but I'm in the same boat with you here.
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  19. #19
    Terminator's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 121Traffic View Post
    Again...given his views, I don't know how any cop can support him.
    Agreed!

  20. #20
    Bob Loblaw's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 121Traffic View Post
    Again...given his views, I don't know how any cop can support him.
    I'm not sure how anyone struggling to stretch their paycheck to make ends meet can NOT support Obama!
    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna
    he (Obama) doesn't have a birth certificate because he wasn't born, he was created in a Muslim witch's cauldron!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    I must admit, there have been few pieces of meat I've ever jammed into my mouth that have been as satisfying as Bob's.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gecko45 "The Mall Ninja"
    Vietnam still shudders when it hears the name of a an assasin so skillful and deadly, he is remembered decades later
    Reca is the best thing since sliced bread!

 

 
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