Shrine of the Mall Ninja

**Ryan** · 10-20-08, 12:17 PM

Please read the follwing:

http://lonelymachines.org/mall-ninjas/

Caution: This user is not responsible for keyboards, monitors, or nasal irritation from coffee/soda projectiles

**armsmaster270** · 10-20-08, 03:22 PM

Try http://lonelymachines.org/mall-ninjas That was too funny.

**mack** · 10-20-08, 03:37 PM

Neither one comes through for me

**Ryan** · 10-20-08, 03:52 PM

Should work now. Sorry about that

**jmur5074** · 10-20-08, 08:33 PM

I've seen that before, a real classic!

That reminds me of this
YouTube - MIKE VALLELY - "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" Trailer #1 (2009)

**pgg** · 10-20-08, 09:14 PM

I've read those before.... I was crying reading Gecko and then his "buddy"

**10-42Adam** · 10-20-08, 11:58 PM

I unfortunately know a guy who is just like this. It's funny as hell to read about online, but a whole different story actually having to deal with a guy like this in person...

**CTR man** · 10-21-08, 12:06 AM

OMG, that was hilarious.

**bayern** · 10-21-08, 11:29 AM

Yaknow, I read something in that postings. It read like one of the Nigerian Scam letters. There was somethng in the way it was written that was a bit odd or "foreign." I've delt with foreigners who speak "perfict" english but there is always something that comes thru as foreign.

"... our carbines will be supplied by Hi-Point, or handguns by Lorcin..." who would carry "throwaways"

This guy is a NUT andcould be dangerous.

**Five-0** · 10-21-08, 11:56 AM

Wow........................... ............just wow.

**armsmaster270** · 10-22-08, 05:38 AM

I found butthead on myspace

Gecko45
"TSE in one of America's biggest malls. Tactical Security Enforcer"

Male
32 years old
PLEASANT VALLEY, NEW YORK
United States

Last Login: 2/9/2007
View My: Pics | Videos
Contacting Gecko45

MySpace URL:

http://www.myspace.com/tacticalsecurityenforcer

Gecko45's Interests GeneralMartial Arts, Firearms, Ninjutsu, Tactical GearMusicURBANMovies44 Minutes, Above the Law, The Professional, TelevisionCOPS, Walker Texas Ranger, CHIPS, CSI, 24BooksTom Clancy's CollectionHeroesSam Fisher, Erik Estrada, Chuck Norris, Steven Seagal, Jack Bauer
Gecko45's Details Status:MarriedHere for:Networking, Dating, Serious Relationships, FriendsOrientation:BiBody type:0' 0"Zodiac Sign:PiscesChildren:Love kids, but not for meEducation:Grad / professional schoolOccupation:TSEIncome:$75,000 to $100,000
Gecko45's Companies Undisclosed
Undisclosed, Undisclosed US
Captain 1st Group
TSE (Tactical Security Enforcer)
1995-Present
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Gecko45's BlurbsAbout me:
Although I cannot say much about myself; I'll start saying I'm a Tactical Security Enforcer in one of America's biggest malls (exact location undisclosed). I chose the duty of packing heat all time to serve and protect, although my jobzone is much more difficult than the patrol zones cops usually go around. As Captain of the Elite TSE Unit, we conduct grueling training in martial arts, firearms, emergency procedures, hostage situations, and backup assistance to the cops, if they fail (doughnuts en masse slow down the body). I use only Second Chance Body Armor, with IIIA level ceramic plates, and sew in (well my wifey did) another IIIA plate in order to maximize my protection. We carry Springfield XD's with .40JHP ammo, but I always carry some FMJ bullets which I slit and X on the point, making them incredibly powerful. Who I'd like to meet:
Other members of the Tactical Enforcement Community
Gecko45's Friend Space (Top 7)Gecko45 has 8 friends.

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Gecko45's Friends Comments Displaying 2 of 2 comments ( View All | Add Comment ) Adam

Jan 10 2007 7:10 PM

Dude, i want to work in a mall so badly, but am a little scared of the obvious high-levels of gang violence that go on in these places. Even moreso, i am scared for my butt. You never know what these 11 year olds with AR-15's have in mind for your poor butt. I mean, i dont even know how you maintain your myspace site with all the Superman shit you do, y'know.... chasing kids down who steal black light posters, kids who leave their food trash in the food court WITHOUT throwing it away, making sure the mexican whos buffing the floors isn't al-qaeda.. etc etc. Mabu

Jan 2 2007 3:55 AM

Greetings from Mabu Khan, Ruler of Men, and the Warrior Prince of TEOTWAWKI! Now we need to find GunKid. Add Comment

**Ryan** · 10-22-08, 10:14 AM

It's almost scary to think that this guy isn't kidding. When I first started reading, I figured it was a 13 year old who read guns and ammo and whacked off to sniper rifles and scopes. Now it seems this guy might actually be an adult and although there is no way in hell any of what he says is real, he could probably purchase weapons (barring any felonies, mental stays, etc) and who knows what he is capable of! The voices in his head might tell him that his elite services are requested at the hot dog stand of some mall and he could take out a few innocent weiners

**armsmaster270** · 10-23-08, 05:19 AM

evidently the guy Todd runs the 9x19.com forum and gave the ninja an advice forum and his mall ninja group is classified according to him at the Ultra-Top Secret level with the U.S. Govt---What a maroon as Bugs would say. So now he has full Govt sanction, so don't carry off duty if you are going to the Mall

**Ryan** · 10-23-08, 10:48 AM

How did you get into 9x19?

**txdm40** · 10-26-08, 02:11 PM

Wow is all I can say. Its guys like this that make me think twice before I carry offduty where security guards are employed. I sure would hate for the store to fill with smoke before the entry team comes in to stop the 12 yo shoplifter. I dont know how I would react to that.

**Xiphos** · 10-26-08, 04:53 PM

I think it came out a few years ago that another Glocktalk member actually posted that as a joke. Some of the Glocktalk folks here can probably speak more on that.

Nevertheless it's an insanely funny read.

**IMachU** · 10-26-08, 05:42 PM

Whoa....if it's real, then this guy will be a danger to himself and others pretty soon (judjing by the way he's talking....)

**pgg** · 10-27-08, 12:46 AM

I found this from today

http://www.thefiringline.com/forums/...d.php?t=316724

**armsmaster270** · 10-27-08, 04:40 AM

For some reason I can access thefiringline

**armsmaster270** · 10-27-08, 04:52 AM

Originally Posted by Ryan

How did you get into 9x19?

http://9x19mm.com/

Posted: Tue Dec 26, 2006 4:25 pm Post subject: Ask Gecko45!

Fellow Forum Members,

It is with great & dubious honor that the staff at 9x19mm.com welcomes Gecko45 into our ranks. While perhaps best known for the now-infamous "Mall Ninja" thread, Gecko45 has joined 9x19mm.com to offer his ... unique ... perspective and advice on all matter of tactical & gear issues.

Please feel free to use this resource at your discretion. All normal Forum Rules apply.

Enjoy!
_________________
Train Hard, Stay Safe!
Todd Louis Green
pistol-training.com