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Thread: Funny

  1. #1
    dt1872005 is offline Banned
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    Police Comments

    #15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out

    after you wear them awhile."

    #14 "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a

    worthless document."

    #13 "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

    #12 "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? In case you didn't know,

    that is the average speed of a 9mm bullet fired from my gun."

    #11 "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can

    write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

    #10 "Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it

    will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"

    #9 "Warning! You want a warning? OK, I'm warning you not to do that again

    or I'll give you another ticket."

    #8 "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or

    not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

    #7 "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to

    ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey doo-doo."

    #6 "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

    #5 "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

    #4 "Just how big were those two beers?"

    #3 "No sir we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas but now

    we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

    #2 "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours.

    At least you know someone who can post your bail."

    #1 "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right 'mam, we

    don't. Sign here.

  2. #2
    Crimebytes2's Avatar
    Crimebytes2 is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by dt1872005
    Police Comments
    Where have I seen this before? Oh, yeah, I remember...


    One should always give credit where credit is due!

  3. #3
    dt1872005 is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crimebytes2
    Where have I seen this before?
    Don't know. Someone emailed it to me.

  4. #4
    jmur5074's Avatar
    jmur5074 is offline Moderator
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    Repost on this site as well...
    No one has greater love than this, to lay down ones life for ones friends - John 15:13

    "The Wicked Flee When No Man Pursueth: But The Righteous Are Bold As A Lion".

    We lucky few, we band of brothers. For he who today sheds his blood with me shall be my brother.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~
    The opinions, beliefs, and ideas expressed in this post are mine, and mine alone. They are NOT the opinions, beliefs, ideas, or policies of my Agency, Police Chief, City Council, or any member of my department.

  5. #5
    Terminator's Avatar
    Terminator is offline BANNED
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    Loser banned....thread locked.



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