Welcome to the APBWeb.
Results 1 to 19 of 19
  1. #1
    Bob Loblaw's Avatar
    Bob Loblaw is offline Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    05-16-06
    Location
    America, 2505 A.D.
    Posts
    2,840
    Rep Power
    3732207

    The song I played for my wife on our honeymoon night (slightly NSFW)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna
    he (Obama) doesn't have a birth certificate because he wasn't born, he was created in a Muslim witch's cauldron!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    I must admit, there have been few pieces of meat I've ever jammed into my mouth that have been as satisfying as Bob's.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gecko45 "The Mall Ninja"
    Vietnam still shudders when it hears the name of a an assasin so skillful and deadly, he is remembered decades later
    Reca is the best thing since sliced bread!

  2. #2
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
    Supporting Member Lvl 1
    Join Date
    04-29-06
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    18,097
    Rep Power
    4329092
    "Is it cool if I leave my shirt on, girl, cause I just had a big dinner (Boston Market) and I'm struggling with some negative body issues..."





  3. #3
    Jenna's Avatar
    Jenna is offline sheep
    Premium Lifetime Member
    Join Date
    06-11-06
    Posts
    24,390
    Rep Power
    4817860
    And this must be the sequel

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IegSRQwS8ZQ

  4. #4
    k-9max's Avatar
    k-9max is offline K9 Officer
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    12-21-06
    Location
    Gods Country
    Posts
    3,427
    Rep Power
    686042


    Thats awesome!

    Reps Sent!
    YEAH, IM THE BERRIES, AND CHERRIES IN YOUR REAR VIEW MIRROR.

    Handle every stressful situation like a dog.
    Eat it, Play with it, or piss on it, and walk away!

    As smart as man is, we haven't been able to invent a machine that can smell drugs or tell us where a person has walked, Dogs are sophisticated investigative tools!

  5. #5
    k-9max's Avatar
    k-9max is offline K9 Officer
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    12-21-06
    Location
    Gods Country
    Posts
    3,427
    Rep Power
    686042
    Shit,

    You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Bob Loblaw again.

    Someone catch him for me!
    YEAH, IM THE BERRIES, AND CHERRIES IN YOUR REAR VIEW MIRROR.

    Handle every stressful situation like a dog.
    Eat it, Play with it, or piss on it, and walk away!

    As smart as man is, we haven't been able to invent a machine that can smell drugs or tell us where a person has walked, Dogs are sophisticated investigative tools!

  6. #6
    k-9max's Avatar
    k-9max is offline K9 Officer
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    12-21-06
    Location
    Gods Country
    Posts
    3,427
    Rep Power
    686042
    Jenna,
    My question to you. Why would you ruin such a good thread!
    YEAH, IM THE BERRIES, AND CHERRIES IN YOUR REAR VIEW MIRROR.

    Handle every stressful situation like a dog.
    Eat it, Play with it, or piss on it, and walk away!

    As smart as man is, we haven't been able to invent a machine that can smell drugs or tell us where a person has walked, Dogs are sophisticated investigative tools!

  7. #7
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
    Supporting Member Lvl 1
    Join Date
    04-29-06
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    18,097
    Rep Power
    4329092
    Quote Originally Posted by k-9max View Post
    Shit,




    Someone catch him for me!
    I got him for you!




  8. #8
    kjlaw's Avatar
    kjlaw is online now Swamp Mafia Proud!!!
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    05-11-06
    Location
    Laplace, Louisiana
    Posts
    3,044
    Rep Power
    429574
    Lead from the front and always remember those who came first.



    Capt. Ocativo "OX" Gonzalez
    EOW 6/16/06


    Always remember that a casket is hotter than your vest.

    Quote Originally Posted by conalabu View Post
    Soon the whole world will be in the hands of the Swamp Mafia.

  9. #9
    Bob Loblaw's Avatar
    Bob Loblaw is offline Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    05-16-06
    Location
    America, 2505 A.D.
    Posts
    2,840
    Rep Power
    3732207
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    "Is it cool if I leave my shirt on, girl, cause I just had a big dinner (Boston Market) and I'm struggling with some negative body issues..."

    that specific line is where I went from smiling and thinking it was funny to laughing out loud. priceless.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna
    he (Obama) doesn't have a birth certificate because he wasn't born, he was created in a Muslim witch's cauldron!
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    I must admit, there have been few pieces of meat I've ever jammed into my mouth that have been as satisfying as Bob's.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gecko45 "The Mall Ninja"
    Vietnam still shudders when it hears the name of a an assasin so skillful and deadly, he is remembered decades later
    Reca is the best thing since sliced bread!

  10. #10
    snuffy2202's Avatar
    snuffy2202 is offline JUST ANOTHER TEQUILA SUNRISE
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    06-16-06
    Location
    Alabama
    Posts
    1,713
    Rep Power
    422663
    Rep Sent, Bob!

  11. #11
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
    Supporting Member Lvl 1
    Join Date
    04-29-06
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    18,097
    Rep Power
    4329092
    Quote Originally Posted by Bob Loblaw View Post
    that specific line is where I went from smiling and thinking it was funny to laughing out loud. priceless.

    Same here, although the "I can probably give you seven minutes, four if you don't move around," (or whatever it was) was a good one too.




  12. #12
    k-9max's Avatar
    k-9max is offline K9 Officer
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    12-21-06
    Location
    Gods Country
    Posts
    3,427
    Rep Power
    686042
    *Girl*, making love all night isnt gonna happen, *Girl*


    LMAO, HAhah
    Its the damn truth though, well, ok, for me anyway
    YEAH, IM THE BERRIES, AND CHERRIES IN YOUR REAR VIEW MIRROR.

    Handle every stressful situation like a dog.
    Eat it, Play with it, or piss on it, and walk away!

    As smart as man is, we haven't been able to invent a machine that can smell drugs or tell us where a person has walked, Dogs are sophisticated investigative tools!

  13. #13
    Jenna's Avatar
    Jenna is offline sheep
    Premium Lifetime Member
    Join Date
    06-11-06
    Posts
    24,390
    Rep Power
    4817860
    There's actually a study that supports the claims made by this song!

    By MEGAN K. SCOTT, Associated Press Writer Thu Apr 3, 8:20 AM ET

    NEW YORK - Maybe men had it right all along: It doesn't take long to satisfy a woman in bed. A survey of sex therapists concluded the optimal amount of time for sexual intercourse was 3 to 13 minutes. The findings, to be published in the May issue of the Journal of Sexual Medicine, strike at the notion that endurance is the key to a great sex life.

    If that sounds like good news to you, don't cheer too loudly. The time does not count foreplay, and the therapists did rate sexual intercourse that lasts from 1 to 2 minutes as "too short."

    Researcher Eric Corty said he hoped to ease the minds of those who believe that "more of something good is better, and if you really want to satisfy your partner, you should last forever."

    The questions were not gender-specific, said Corty (who, it must be noted, is male). But he said prior research has shown that both men and women want foreplay and sexual intercourse to last longer.

    Dr. Irwin Goldstein, editor of the Journal of Sexual Medicine, cited a four-week study of 1,500 couples in 2005 that found the median time for sexual intercourse was 7.3 minutes. (Women were armed with stopwatches.)

    It's difficult for both older men and young men to make sexual intercourse last much longer, said Marianne Brandon, a clinical psychologist and director of Wellminds Wellbodies in Annapolis, Md.

    "There are so many myths in our culture of what other people are doing sexually," Brandon said. "Most people's sex lives are not as exciting as other people think they are."

    Fifty members of the Society for Sex Therapy and Research in the U.S. and Canada were surveyed by Corty, an associate professor of psychology at Penn State Erie, The Behrend College, and student Jenay Guardiani. Thirty-four members, or 68 percent, responded, although some said the optimal time depended on the couple.

    Corty said he hoped to give an idea of what therapists find to be normal and satisfactory among the couples they see.

    "People who read this will say, 'I last five minutes or my partner lasts 8 minutes,' and say, 'That's OK,'" he said. "They will relax a little bit."

    http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080403/...e/sex_survey_6

  14. #14
    Terminator's Avatar
    Terminator is offline BANNED
    Join Date
    12-03-05
    Location
    None of your business
    Posts
    16,064
    Rep Power
    0
    NEW YORK - A survey of sex therapists concluded the optimal amount of time for sexual intercourse was 3 to 13 minutes.
    I agree.

  15. #15
    jmur5074's Avatar
    jmur5074 is offline Moderator
    Premium Lifetime Member
    Verified LEO
    Site Moderator
    Join Date
    12-04-05
    Location
    Minnesota
    Posts
    9,051
    Rep Power
    6232623
    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna View Post
    A survey of sex therapists concluded the optimal amount of time for sexual intercourse was 3 to 13 minutes.
    If you added a zero to each of those numbers, thats a typical session for me.
    No one has greater love than this, to lay down ones life for ones friends - John 15:13

    "The Wicked Flee When No Man Pursueth: But The Righteous Are Bold As A Lion".

    We lucky few, we band of brothers. For he who today sheds his blood with me shall be my brother.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~
    The opinions, beliefs, and ideas expressed in this post are mine, and mine alone. They are NOT the opinions, beliefs, ideas, or policies of my Agency, Police Chief, City Council, or any member of my department.

  16. #16
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
    Supporting Member Lvl 1
    Join Date
    04-29-06
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    18,097
    Rep Power
    4329092
    Quote Originally Posted by jmur5074 View Post
    If you added a zero to each of those numbers, thats a typical session for me.
    .03 and .013?




  17. #17
    Shoestring's Avatar
    Shoestring is offline Please dont check the trunk...
    Verified LEO
    Authorized Vendor
    Join Date
    09-20-07
    Location
    Madison ish, WI
    Posts
    2,799
    Rep Power
    799036
    Quote Originally Posted by Buttercup View Post
    .03 and .013?
    Ouch, ha ha

    Oh f'in funny video
    Somebody Please, what the hell is that smell?

    "The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'."

    The views, opinions, stupid off the cuff comments, mouthy, obnoxious, thoughtless, etc etc etc are not always or even some of the time the belief of my department, so bugger off!

  18. #18
    Terminator's Avatar
    Terminator is offline BANNED
    Join Date
    12-03-05
    Location
    None of your business
    Posts
    16,064
    Rep Power
    0

    Talking

    Quote Originally Posted by jmur5074 View Post
    If you added a zero to each of those numbers, thats a typical session for me.


    Actually, it sounds like you're wasting a lot of good time on non-necessities, when you could have finished and already been...

    1) Watching tv
    2) Sleeping
    3) Eating
    4) (Fill in your own answer)

    Sorry, but there is such a thing as too long, even for women. If you're doing it on average for 2+ plus hours every time then she is probably thinking hurry up and finish already.

  19. #19
    Jenna's Avatar
    Jenna is offline sheep
    Premium Lifetime Member
    Join Date
    06-11-06
    Posts
    24,390
    Rep Power
    4817860
    Quote Originally Posted by Terminator View Post
    Wow, sounds like you're wasting a lot of good time on non-necessities, when you could have finished and already been...

    1) Watching tv
    2) Sleeping
    3) Eating
    4) (Fill in your own answer)
    5) Posting on O/R!

 

 

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •