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  1. #1
    Michelle's Avatar
    Michelle is offline Civilian
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    Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck?

    Here is a little test that will help you decide.

    You're walking down a deserted street with your wife
    and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic terrorist
    with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes
    with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises
    the knife, and charges at you.

    You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert
    shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and
    your family.

    What do you do?

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Democrat's Answer

    Well, that's not enough information to answer the
    question!
    Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?
    Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire
    him to attack?
    Could we run away?
    What does my wife think? What about the kids?
    Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock
    the knife out of his hand?
    What does the law say about this situation?
    Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
    Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind
    of message does this send to society and to my
    children?
    Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
    Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be
    content just to wound me?
    If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my
    family get away while he was stabbing me?
    Should I call 9-1-1 ?
    Why is this street so deserted?
    We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and
    make this a happier, healthier street that would
    discourage such behavior.
    This is all so confusing!
    I need to discuss with some friends over a latte and
    try to come to a consensus.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Republican's Answer:

    BANG!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Redneck's Answer:

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    Click....
    (sounds of reloading)

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    click ...

    Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the
    Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"

    Son: "You got him, Pop! Can I shoot the next one?"

    Wife: "You are not taking that to the taxidermist
    ______

  2. #2
    conalabu is offline Grasshopper
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    I do not think I have ever been called a redneck before.
    And Shepards we shall be,
    for thee, My Lord, for thee,
    Power hath descended forth from Thy hand,
    That our feet may swiftly carry out Thy Command.
    So we shall flow a river forth to Thee
    And teeming with souls will it ever be.
    In Nomine Patris, Et Filli, Et Spiritus Sancti.

  3. #3
    kay88's Avatar
    kay88 is offline Sergeant
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    New Ulm, MN
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    so true. HAHA
    Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.
    ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

  4. #4
    Ducky's Avatar
    Ducky is offline Enforcer General
    Supporting Member Lvl 3
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    Quote Originally Posted by conalabu View Post
    I do not think I have ever been called a redneck before.
    Ditto, although MrDucky would look at me afterward and calmly say "I think he's dead now, honey, and kicking him just makes you look anti-social."
    \\
    ` ` ` ` < ` )___/\
    `` ` ` ` (3--(____)
    "...but to forget your duck, of course, means you're really screwed." - Gary Larson
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtN1YnoL46Q


  5. #5
    TXCharlie's Avatar
    TXCharlie is offline Former & Future Reserve Officer
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    FYI,

    My answer would be
    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG!
    Click....
    (sounds of reloading)

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    Click....
    (other gun comes out)

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    Click....
    (sounds of reloading)

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

    (My main gun holds 17 rounds (16+1) - What does that make me???)

    PS - Silvertips ARE hollowpoints - But mine are Ranger +P+ hollowpoints. I would suggest putting your fingers in your ears
    Last edited by TXCharlie; 11-14-06 at 11:00 PM.

    (\__/)
    (='.'=) This is Bunny. Copy and paste Bunny into your
    (")_(") signature to help him gain world domination.

  6. #6
    LAW DOG's Avatar
    LAW DOG is offline Law Enforcement, isn't a job it's a brotherhood!!
    Verified LEO
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    I'm A Redneck
    S.W.A.T Maximum Violents

  7. #7
    Piggybank Cop's Avatar
    Piggybank Cop is offline Nobody important.
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    Quote Originally Posted by LAW DOG View Post
    I'm A Redneck
    Me too.
    We are the thin blue line
    between you
    and all the money in the world.

    And no you can't have any.

  8. #8
    bayern's Avatar
    bayern is online now Officer First Class
    Verified LEO
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    Redneck

    RED NECK, however, my wife who really doesn't under stand me would ask "Why did you do that??"

  9. #9
    TXCharlie's Avatar
    TXCharlie is offline Former & Future Reserve Officer
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    My wife would say, "Here, ya wanta borrow mine to finish him off?"

    (\__/)
    (='.'=) This is Bunny. Copy and paste Bunny into your
    (")_(") signature to help him gain world domination.

 

 

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