Welcome to the APBWeb.
Results 1 to 3 of 3
  1. #1
    TXCharlie's Avatar
    TXCharlie is offline Former & Future Reserve Officer
    Join Date
    12-29-05
    Location
    Dallas Area
    Posts
    5,528
    Rep Power
    3224964

    Talking An Engineer's View of Christmas

    Engineers take the fun out of Christmas. There are approximately two and
    one-half billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since
    Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except
    maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to
    15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the population reference
    bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that
    comes to 108 million homes, presuming there is at least one good child in
    each.

    Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different
    time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to west (which seems
    logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that,
    for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of
    a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the
    stocking, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever
    snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh
    and get on to the next house.

    Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around
    the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the
    purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.7 miles per
    household; a total trip of 75.6 million miles, not counting bathroom stops
    or breaks.

    This means Santa's sleigh is moving faster than 675 miles per second --
    3,000 times the speed of sound.
    For purposes of comparison, the fastest
    man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a pokey 27.4 miles per
    second, and a conventional reindeer can (at best) run at the rate of 15
    miles per hour.

    The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that
    each child gets nothing more than a medium sized LEGO set (about three
    pounds), the sleigh is carrying approximately 570 thousand tons, not
    counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more
    than 300 pounds. Even granting that a "flying" reindeer could pull 10 times
    the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them --
    Santa would need 378,000 of them.
    This increases the payload, not counting
    the weight of the sleigh, another 38,000 tons, or roughly seven times the
    weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).

    Six hundred thousand tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous
    air resistance - this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a
    spacecraft reentering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer
    would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short,
    they would burst into flames almost instantaneously
    , exposing the reindeer
    behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire
    reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or
    right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.

    Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from
    a dead stop to 650 mps. in 0.001 seconds, would be subjected to acceleration
    forces of 17,000 g's. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would
    be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly
    crushing his bones and organs
    and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink
    goo.

    Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now. Merry Christmas.
    Last edited by TXCharlie; 12-21-06 at 12:11 PM.

    (\__/)
    (='.'=) This is Bunny. Copy and paste Bunny into your
    (")_(") signature to help him gain world domination.

  2. #2
    BEB
    BEB is offline Banned
    Join Date
    11-27-06
    Posts
    1,838
    Rep Power
    0

    Merry Christmas!

  3. #3
    TXCharlie's Avatar
    TXCharlie is offline Former & Future Reserve Officer
    Join Date
    12-29-05
    Location
    Dallas Area
    Posts
    5,528
    Rep Power
    3224964
    Gee, thanks - Do you mind if I recycle your gift and give it to someone else? I haven't been shopping yet

    (\__/)
    (='.'=) This is Bunny. Copy and paste Bunny into your
    (")_(") signature to help him gain world domination.

 

 

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Judge’s gift to 23 convicts: Christmas behind bars
    By Hannibal in forum In the News
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 12-19-06, 01:36 AM
  2. Christmas music...
    By Retmilleo909 in forum General Topics
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 12-04-06, 05:31 PM
  3. Christmas Watch
    By Willowdared in forum General Topics
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 11-28-06, 04:10 AM

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •