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Thread: Hitman

  1. #1
    bufford408's Avatar
    bufford408 is offline Just green and furry all over
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    Two old friends were just about to tee off at the first hole of their local
    golf course when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind
    if I join you? My partner didn't turn up."

    "Sure," they said, "You're welcome." So they started playing and enjoyed
    the game and the company of the newcomer. Part way around the course, one
    of the friends asked the newcomer, "What do you do for a living?"

    I'm a hit man," was the reply.

    "You're joking!" was the response.

    "No, I'm not," he said, reaching into his golf bag, and pulling out a
    beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight. "Here are my

    "That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said the other friend, "Can I take a
    look? I think I might be able to see my house from here."

    So he picked up the rifle and looked through the sight in the direction of
    his house.

    "Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can see
    right in the window." "Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom. Ha Ha, I can
    see she's naked!! Wait a minute, that's my neighbor in there with
    her...... He's naked, too!!!

    He turned to the hit man, "How much do you charge for a hit?"

    I'll do a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the

    Can you do two for me now?"

    Sure, what do you want?"

    First, shoot my wife, she's always been mouthy, so shoot her in the mouth."

    "Then the neighbor, he's a friend of mine, so just shoot his dick off to
    teach him a lesson."

    The hit man took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a few

    "Are you going to do it or not?" said the friend impatiently.

    "Just be patient," said the hit man calmly, "I think I can save you a
    grand here....."
    The opinions of my posts are the sole responsibilty of my employer due to the fact that they have totally and completely warped my mind.


  2. #2
    Rhino's Avatar
    Rhino is offline Meat-eater & Fire-breather
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    I lawled.



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