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  1. #1
    Willowdared's Avatar
    Willowdared is offline Bendy not Breaky
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    Talking Always Wear Clean Underwear in Public

    Better yet, always wear underwear!

    Always wear clean underwear in public, especially when working under Your vehicle...From the Northwest Florida Daily News
    comes this story of a Crestview couple who drove their car to Wal-Mart,only to have their car break down in the parking lot.

    The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car in the lot. The wife returned later to see a small
    group of people near the car. On closer inspection, she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the chassis.

    Although the man was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts into glaringly public ones.

    Unable to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put her hand UP his shorts, and tucked everything back into place. On regaining her feet, she looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband who was standing idly by.

    The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his forehead.
    Molly Weasley makes Chuck Norris eat his vegetables.

    Do not puff, shade, skew, tailor, firm up, stretch, massage,
    or otherwise distort statements of fact.
    FBI Special Agent Coleen Rowley

  2. #2
    gozling's Avatar
    gozling is offline the gene pool could use a little chlorine
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    HAAHHAHAHAHAh omg that is funny
    http://www.allpoetry.com/Grunts%20Girl

    We dallied under
    Vine maples and sapling alders
    Searched for lady slippers
    But instead
    Found blackberry riots and
    Desiccated branches

    An old skid road
    Brought ghost ferns and
    Hollows filled with
    Skunk cabbage
    While waves wrapped
    Intricate lacings of weeds
    'Round mule spinners

    His cyanotic eyes
    Were hard enough to make
    The sun turn tail and
    Tender enough to attract me
    To his world of illusion

  3. #3
    countybear's Avatar
    countybear is offline BDRT - Baby Daddy Removal Team
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    "The American Republic will endure until the day Congress discovers that it can bribe the public with the public's money."
    - Alexis de Tocqueville, Democracy in America

    Tell me not, Sweet, I am unkind,
    That from the nunnery
    Of thy chaste breast and quiet mind
    To war and arms I fly.
    - Lovelace

    The opinions expressed by this poster are wholly his own, and should never be construed to even remotely be in representation of his employer, its agencies or assigns. In fact, they probably fail to be in alignment with the opinions of any rational human being.

  4. #4
    Lo523's Avatar
    Lo523 is offline Master Officer
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    Hilarious!
    Never approach a bull by the front, a horse from behind, or an idiot from any direction.

  5. #5
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
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    Hahahaha!!




  6. #6
    iso607's Avatar
    iso607 is offline Sergeant
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    Very funny.

  7. #7
    blackcamaro8895's Avatar
    blackcamaro8895 is offline Master Officer
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    LMFAO Just when it couldnt get any better......AHHHHH HAHAHAHAHAHA

  8. #8
    Ducky's Avatar
    Ducky is offline Enforcer General
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    \\
    ` ` ` ` < ` )___/\
    `` ` ` ` (3--(____)
    "...but to forget your duck, of course, means you're really screwed." - Gary Larson
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtN1YnoL46Q


  9. #9
    Sapper_132's Avatar
    Sapper_132 is offline Master Turd Cutter
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    I heard of this before. Still funny!!!
    Just because your sign off after you're shift is done, doesn't mean that it's over and put blinders on. You're a cop 24/7 wether you like it or not. If thats something you can't handle, you should find a new line of work!

  10. #10
    kay88's Avatar
    kay88 is offline Sergeant
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    HAHA! Good one!
    Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.
    ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

  11. #11
    Just KC's Avatar
    Just KC is offline Who?......Me?
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    Bahahaha love it!!
    **********************
    ~Karie

    "I used to care
    but now I take a pill for that"

  12. #12
    k-9max's Avatar
    k-9max is offline K9 Officer
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    hahahaha, i didnt realize my story got out so fast.

    by the way, i do wear underwear now.

    the stitches only last a couple of weeks.
    YEAH, IM THE BERRIES, AND CHERRIES IN YOUR REAR VIEW MIRROR.

    Handle every stressful situation like a dog.
    Eat it, Play with it, or piss on it, and walk away!

    As smart as man is, we haven't been able to invent a machine that can smell drugs or tell us where a person has walked, Dogs are sophisticated investigative tools!

  13. #13
    Willowdared's Avatar
    Willowdared is offline Bendy not Breaky
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    Meanwhile, Virginian is hanging out in Walmart parking lots offering to fix people's cars.

    Molly Weasley makes Chuck Norris eat his vegetables.

    Do not puff, shade, skew, tailor, firm up, stretch, massage,
    or otherwise distort statements of fact.
    FBI Special Agent Coleen Rowley

  14. #14
    blackcamaro8895's Avatar
    blackcamaro8895 is offline Master Officer
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    i really dont know what i would do if i was caught in that woman's situation.

 

 

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