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  1. #1
    Tony's Avatar
    Tony is offline Banned
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    Men Are Just Happier People

    Men Are Just Happier People . .

    Your last name stays put.
    The garage is all yours.
    Wedding plans take care of themselves.
    Chocolate is just another snack.
    You can be President.
    You can never be pregnant.
    You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park
    You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
    The world is your urinal.
    You never have to drive to another gas station rest room because this one is just too icky.
    You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
    Same work, more pay.
    Wrinkles add character.
    Wedding dress~$5000. Tux rental~$100.
    People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
    The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
    New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
    One mood all the time.
    Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
    You know stuff about tanks.
    A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
    You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
    If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
    Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
    Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
    You almost never have strap problems in public.
    You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
    Everything on your face stays its original color.
    The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
    You only have to shave your face and neck.
    You can play with toys all your life.
    Your belly usually hides your big hips.
    One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.
    You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
    You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
    You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
    You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
    Last edited by Tony; 06-07-07 at 06:34 PM.

  2. #2
    SANDMAN's Avatar
    SANDMAN is offline Master Officer
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    Amen to that.

    Never have truer words been said
    If at first you don't succeed, then bomb disposal probably isn't for you.

    Never argue with an idiot. They will bring you down to there level and beat you on experience.

  3. #3
    pc830cop's Avatar
    pc830cop is offline Just another squirrel looking for a NUT
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    Sounds like my life ... and the reason why I'm divorced!


    Searching for Evil and the Perfect donut (Love that book)

    "It's not who you are underneath, but what you do that defines you"
    -Batman Begins

    There are gains for all our losses
    There are balms for all our pain
    But, when youth, the dream, departs
    It takes something from our hearts
    And it never comes again

    "Captain, it is I Ensign Pulver. I just threw your damn palm tree overboard. Now, what's all this crap about no movie tonight?" -Ens Pulver in Mister Roberts

    The man who will go where his colors go, without asking who will fight a phantom foe in the jungle and mountain range, without counting, and who will suffer and die in the midst of incredible hardship, without complaint, is still what he has always been, from Imperial Rome to sceptered Britain to democratic America. He is the stuff of which legions are made. ...His pride is in his colors and his regiment, his training hard and thorough and coldly realistic, to fit him for what he must face...and his obedience is to his orders. He has been called United State Marine.
    T.R. Fehrenbach, This Kind of War

  4. #4
    Blue Jacket's Avatar
    Blue Jacket is offline Rookie
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    Glad you realize that women do all the work around here!!!
    "Never Forget 9-11"

  5. #5
    NCC1701's Avatar
    NCC1701 is offline Meat Popsicle
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blue Jacket View Post
    Glad you realize that women do all the work around here!!!
    Yes Dear.
    Whatever you say Dear.
    Uh huh.


    I don't like repeat offenders I like DEAD offenders-
    Ted Nugent

    Make the world a better place....punch a hippie in the face!

    Former member of Cortinian Liberation Front and the JSA MACHATOC.

  6. #6
    Cst.SB's Avatar
    Cst.SB is offline Officer First Class
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    I don't know, there has to be someone thing said about being able to have multiple orgasms.

    If I was a woman Durcel would be trading at $500 a share..

  7. #7
    Tony's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cst.SB View Post
    I don't know, there has to be someone thing said about being able to have multiple orgasms.

    If I was a woman Durcel would be trading at $500 a share..







 

 

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