What is the thinnest book in the world?
"What Men Know About Women"

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One ... men will screw anything.

How does a man take a bubble bath?
He eats beans for dinner.

What's a man's idea of foreplay?
A half hour of begging.

How can you tell if a man is sexually excited?
He's breathing.

How do you save a man from drowning?
Take your foot off his head.

How can you tell if a man is happy?
Who cares?

How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
We don't know .... it's never happened.

What is a man's idea of helping with the housework?
Lifting his leg so you can vacuum.

What does a man consider a seven-course meal?
A hot dog and a six-pack of beer.

Why do men name their penises?
Because they want to be on a first name basis with the person who
makes all their decisions.

Why is it so hard for women to find men who are sensitive, caring, and good looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.

How many men does it take to pop popcorn?
Three! One to hold the pan and two others to show off and shake the stove.

How do men sort their laundry?
"Filthy" and "Filthy but wearable"

Husband: "Want a quickie?"
Wife: "As opposed to what?"

Husband: "I don't know why you wear a bra, you've go nothing to put in it."
Wife: "You wear briefs, don't you?"

Sadly this is here as a balance to some of my other posts.