Welcome to the APBWeb.
Results 1 to 2 of 2
  1. #1
    JLK's Avatar
    JLK
    JLK is offline Protecting Those That Can't Protect Themselves
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    06-23-06
    Location
    memphis
    Posts
    1,606
    Rep Power
    1388294

    onions and christmas trees

    ONIONS AND CHRISTMAS TREES


    A family is at the dinner table.The son asks his father, "Dad,
    how many kinds of boobs are there?

    The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there are three
    kinds of breasts. In her 20's, a woman's breasts are like melons, round
    and firm. In Her 30's to
    40's, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After
    50, they are like onions".

    "Onions?"
    "Yes, you see them and they make you cry."

    This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said,
    "Mum, How many kinds of 'willies' are there?"

    The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man
    goes through three phases. In his 20's, his willy is like an oak tree,
    Mighty and hard. In his 30's and 40's, it is like a birch, flexible! but
    reliable.
    After his 50's, it is like a Christmas tree".

    A Christmas tree?"
    "Yes, Dear - dead from the root up and the balls are just for
    decoration."


    "A strong man stands up for himself. A stronger man stands up for others."
    Ben

    The old sheriff was attending an awards dinner when a lady commented
    on his wearing his sidearm. "Sheriff, I see you have your pistol. Are you
    expecting trouble?" "No Ma'am. If I were expecting trouble, I would have
    brought my rifle."
    (just stole this one hope you don't mind)


    The trouble with our liberal friends is not that they are ignorant,
    it is just that they know so much that isn't so.
    President Ronald Reagan



  2. #2
    kay88's Avatar
    kay88 is offline Sergeant
    Join Date
    09-28-06
    Location
    New Ulm, MN
    Posts
    1,689
    Rep Power
    60408
    Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.
    ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

 

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •