Two elderly friends, Larry and Ken, met in the park every day to play chess, feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels, discuss world problems, and watch the ladies walk by.

One day Larry didnt show up. Ken didn't think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something. But after Larry hadn't shown up for a week or so, Ken got really worried. However, since the only time they got together was in the park, Ken didn't know where Larry lived, so he was unable to find out what happened to him.

A month passed, and Ken figured he had seen the last of Larry, but one day, Ken approached the park and-- lo and behold-- there sat Larry!! Ken was very excited to see his old friend and told him so.

Then he said, "For crying out loud Larry, what in the world happened to you?"

Larry replied, "I've been in jail!"

"Jail?" Cried Ken. "What in the world for?"

"Well," Larry said, "You know Suzie, that cute little blond waitress at the coffee shop over there that we sometimes go to?"

"Yeah", said Ken, "I remember her." "What about her?"

"Well, last month I pinched her on the butt and told her she was cute. She filed rape charges on me, and, at 89 years old, I was so proud that when I went to court, I pleaded guilty!"

"The Judge then gave me 30 days for perjury!!!"