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Thread: Stuttering

  1. #1
    keith720's Avatar
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    Stuttering

    A teacher is explaining biology to her 3rd grade students. She says,
    "Human beings are the only animals that stutter."
    A little girl raises her hand and says, "I had a kitty-cat who
    stuttered."

    The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become,
    asked the girl to describe the incident.

    "Well," the little girl began, "I was in the back yard with my kitty
    and the rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before
    we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!"

    That must've been scary," says the teacher.

    "It sure was," says the little girl. "My kitty raised his back, went
    'Fffff, Fffff, Fffff'".

    "And before he could say 'Fuck!' the rottweiler got him!"
    For the morning will come. Brightly will it shine on the brave and true, kindly upon all who suffer for the cause, glorious upon the tombs of heroes. Thus will shine the dawn.

    Winston Churchill

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  3. #3
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    Fuuuuuunny

  4. #4
    Cidp24's Avatar
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    Now THATS funny!!
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  5. #5
    gozling's Avatar
    gozling is offline the gene pool could use a little chlorine
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    HAHAHAHAHA omg... juice just game out my gnoze
    http://www.allpoetry.com/Grunts%20Girl

    We dallied under
    Vine maples and sapling alders
    Searched for lady slippers
    But instead
    Found blackberry riots and
    Desiccated branches

    An old skid road
    Brought ghost ferns and
    Hollows filled with
    Skunk cabbage
    While waves wrapped
    Intricate lacings of weeds
    'Round mule spinners

    His cyanotic eyes
    Were hard enough to make
    The sun turn tail and
    Tender enough to attract me
    To his world of illusion

  6. #6
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    LMAO!!!!!!! Good one!!!
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    conalabu is offline Grasshopper
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    Have I told you about the guy I went canoing with that had a stutter? He was in front and we hit some rapids. I forgot about the stutter because he only does it when he gets excited. All of a sudden I hear him yelling..."rrr. RRR. RRRRRRR." Then we hit a rock. He then turned around and calmly said..."Rock ahead."
    And Shepards we shall be,
    for thee, My Lord, for thee,
    Power hath descended forth from Thy hand,
    That our feet may swiftly carry out Thy Command.
    So we shall flow a river forth to Thee
    And teeming with souls will it ever be.
    In Nomine Patris, Et Filli, Et Spiritus Sancti.

  8. #8
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    LMAO! That's a great one.

    There was a guy in one of the smaller villages around here who was on the PD and FD. Super great guy, and ya felt bad for it, but when he would get on the radio you'd have to chuckle a little bit.
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  9. #9
    SaraJ is offline Banned
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    All of the above were funny! Another stutter joke. . .

    A guy was sitting on a park bench, his head hanging down. A friend came along and sat down next to him.

    "Hey, buddy, what's the matter? You look like you lost your last friend."

    "Well, I guess you could say I did. You know how I stutter when I'm nervous? But when I'm not I don't. So sometimes people don't know I stutter?"

    "Yeah."

    "Well, my girlfriend's parents were over for dinner and we were sitting around the living room. The dogs were on the floor and Annabel was licking Peter's nose. I started to tell my future in-laws that in a few weeks, after our marriage, that's what my girlfriend was going to be doing to me. But by the time I got it out, Peter was licking his balls."

 

 

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