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  1. #1
    Tony's Avatar
    Tony is offline Banned
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    Proud to be an Aussie

    Being Australian is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for A Belgian beer, then on the way home, grabbing an Indian curry or A Turkish kebab, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.

    Oh and...... Only in Australia ... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

    Only in Australia ... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

    Only in Australia ... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke.

    Only in Australia ... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.

    Only in Australia ... do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

    NOT TO MENTION...

    3 Aussies die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

    58 Aussies are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

    31 Aussies have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

    8 Aussies had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

    A massive 543 Aussies were admitted to Emergency in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.


    and finally.........

    In 2000 eight Aussies cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.

  2. #2
    keith720's Avatar
    keith720 is offline Finely Aged
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    It sounds like you stole this list from the "Swamp Mafia!" Don't worry though: They won't reply until after someone reads it to them tomorrow!
    For the morning will come. Brightly will it shine on the brave and true, kindly upon all who suffer for the cause, glorious upon the tombs of heroes. Thus will shine the dawn.

    Winston Churchill

  3. #3
    mack's Avatar
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    I agree that does sound suspiciously familiar Tony. I think you found that in your travels in the US and decided to take it home.

    My dad, I miss him every day.

    Originally Posted by Wolven
    Life is too short to wear unsexy underwear.


    I am a female!!!!! LMAO

    Be who you are and say what you feel.....
    Because those that matter...don't mind...
    And those that mind...don't matter

  4. #4
    Tony's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mack View Post
    I agree that does sound suspiciously familiar Tony. I think you found that in your travels in the US and decided to take it home.

    My daughter sent it to me when I was over your way . . . I'm sorry if it's been adapted my others here . . . .




  5. #5
    keith720's Avatar
    keith720 is offline Finely Aged
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    I think your list applies to just about any civilized area, except perhaps....................... ....Louisiana! There, they lock their dog house, but leave their home open. In Louisiana the term "TOOTHpaste" is exactly correct.
    For the morning will come. Brightly will it shine on the brave and true, kindly upon all who suffer for the cause, glorious upon the tombs of heroes. Thus will shine the dawn.

    Winston Churchill

 

 

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