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  1. #1
    Elle's Avatar
    Elle is offline Banned
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    11 Types Of Women In The Powder Room

    Indifferent

    Rushes in, raises dress with a "whoop," pulls crotch of panties aside and squats with great force, rattling windows and causing breasts to bob up and down. Hums lively tunes and sounds like a bucket of water being poured from third story window.

    * * *

    Cautious

    Has heard of so many girls contracting VD from toilet seats that she straddles bowl, leans over to flush, pees on her nylons.

    * * *

    Worried

    A week past due. Squats thoughtfully, counting days overdue on fingers. Uses toilet paper, examines it hopefully. Peers into toilet before flushing, sighing deeply. Walks out biting nails after forgetting to wash hands. Resolves never to go to bed drunk again.

    * * *

    Conceited

    Approaches toilet with undulating movements, giving the other girls high-fives. Raises dress by fingertips. Expression while peeing indicates that such a lovely creature should not be compelled to attend to such lowly duties. This type farts louder than a firecracker and stinks like a goat.

    * * *

    Sloppy

    Skirt drags in toilet while squatting, pees all over front of toilet seat, never uses toilet paper, drags her business all over seat, forgets to flush and emerges with back of skirt caught in panties.

    * * *

    Timid

    Looks under stall door to see if anyone else is in the can, turns on faucet full force, backs up to toilet, squats quickly, flushes for constant flow of water, coughs, hums, listens intently to learn if sound other than faucet can be heard. Ends up with loud fart, walks out blushing.

    * * *

    Cross-Eyed

    Sits on one cheek on the side of the seat and pees all over the floor. Usually wears rubber boots on her visits to the can and carries a box of Kleenex in her purse.

    * * *

    Frivolous

    Lets stream go in little squirts to the tune of "Row, Row, Row Your Boat."

    * * *

    Literary

    Always takes book of the month to the can with her. Blames "Forever Amber" for her piles.

    * * *

    Big Time

    Always leaves toilet door open while she chats and brags to the other girls about the guy she "had" last night. Shows girls her panties with black lace edging and "Welcome" embroidered in the crotch. Has never been to bed with a man.

    * * *

    Drunk

    Wobbles to toilet. After several attempts, manages to raise dress. Squats on toilet with shrieks of laughter, pees for awhile singing happy little songs. Suddenly starts sobbing uncontrollably as she realizes that she forgot to pull her panties down. Sighs, continues to pee and sob.

  2. #2
    gozling's Avatar
    gozling is offline the gene pool could use a little chlorine
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    LOL those were funny
    i have to say i am:

    Frivolous

    Lets stream go in little squirts to the tune of "Row, Row, Row Your Boat."
    http://www.allpoetry.com/Grunts%20Girl

    We dallied under
    Vine maples and sapling alders
    Searched for lady slippers
    But instead
    Found blackberry riots and
    Desiccated branches

    An old skid road
    Brought ghost ferns and
    Hollows filled with
    Skunk cabbage
    While waves wrapped
    Intricate lacings of weeds
    'Round mule spinners

    His cyanotic eyes
    Were hard enough to make
    The sun turn tail and
    Tender enough to attract me
    To his world of illusion

  3. #3
    Norm357's Avatar
    Norm357 is offline Corporal
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    This thread is worthless without pics.
    dlefdal said:
    Ummmm, what if I don't like thumbs in my butt?

  4. #4
    MacLean's Avatar
    MacLean is online now O/R Gun mod
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    gozling, that was *way* too much information!

    :P
    I'm your huckleberry...

    Quemadmoeum gladis nemeinum occidit, occidentus telum est!

    You can be the weapon, and the gun in your hand is a tool - or the gun is a weapon and you are the tool.


    I was looking for a saint who was a devil of a lover,
    but every girl I found was either one way or the other...



  5. #5
    hush29's Avatar
    hush29 is offline Corporal
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    Suddenly, i feel like i've known Gozling my whole life. LOL
    It's better to be judged by 12 than carried by 6.

  6. #6
    CTR man's Avatar
    CTR man is offline Officer First Class
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    TMI TMI TMI


    Choose The Right. When you're doing whats right, then you have nothing to worry about.

    Not a LEO

    In memory of Sgt. Howard K. Stevenson 1965 - 2005. Ceres Police Dept.
    In memory of Robert N. Panos 1955 - 2008 Ceres Police Dept.









  7. #7
    213th's Avatar
    213th is offline Solipsist
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    Quote Originally Posted by Norm357 View Post
    This thread is worthless without pics.
    That's just wrong
    He who has the money, signs the cheques.
    He who signs the cheques, makes the rules.
    He who makes the rules, has the power.
    He who has the power, has the money.

  8. #8
    Norm357's Avatar
    Norm357 is offline Corporal
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    Quote Originally Posted by 213th View Post
    That's just wrong

    Yeah, I know.
    dlefdal said:
    Ummmm, what if I don't like thumbs in my butt?

  9. #9
    Rhino's Avatar
    Rhino is offline Meat-eater & Fire-breather
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    Norm,

    That comment, plus your userpic, plus your title = phone call to FBI.

    "If everyone is thinking alike, then someone isn't thinking." -Gen. George S. Patton

  10. #10
    armsmaster270's Avatar
    armsmaster270 is offline Ret. Sac. P.D. - 270th M.P. Co., Now with D.H.S.
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    God am I gonna give my wife a bad time with this. A little knowledge can kill you.


    Pretty women make us BUY beer. Ugly women make us DRINK beer. --Al Bundy

    http://www.armsmaster.net-a.googlepages.com

 

 

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