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Thread: Lawyer Jokes
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11-14-07, 12:55 AM #1
Tempus Fugit
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Lawyer Jokes
Some of them are my best friends, mostly procecutors (imagine that
) but they are always worth some good natured ribbing.
What are some of your best lawyer jokes?
What happens when you give a lawyer viagra?
He stands up straight and gets taller.*************************"It wouldn't take much for me to up and run...to another life somewhere in the sun."
*************************"There's something inherently wrong with having to put on a bullet-proof vest and a gun to go to work."-(An old friend)
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11-14-07, 01:17 AM #2
Protecting Those That Can't Protect Themselves
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what do you call a bus load of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
a good start.
what do you call a bus load of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean with an empty set?
wasted space.
"A strong man stands up for himself. A stronger man stands up for others."
Ben
The old sheriff was attending an awards dinner when a lady commented
on his wearing his sidearm. "Sheriff, I see you have your pistol. Are you
expecting trouble?" "No Ma'am. If I were expecting trouble, I would have
brought my rifle."
(just stole this one hope you don't mind)
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11-14-07, 01:25 AM #3
Sergeant
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Q: If you are stranded on a desert island with Adolph Hitler, Atilla the Hun, and a lawyer, and you have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do?
A: Shoot the lawyer twice.
Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.
Q: Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
A: Professional courtesy.
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