Good Quotes

After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles"

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway

I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.

Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light

Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places