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  1. #1
    carolina's Avatar
    carolina is offline Master Officer
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    Drivers License Tells All

    Drivers License Tells All
    A mother is driving a little girl to her friends house
    for a play date.

    'Mommy,' the little girl asks, 'how old are you?'

    'Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age,'
    the mother replied. 'It's not polite.'

    'OK', the little girl says, 'How much do you weigh?'

    'Now really,' the mother says, 'those are personal
    questions and are really none of your business.'

    Undaunted, the little girl asks, 'Why did you and
    Daddy get a divorce?'

    'That is enough questions, young lady, honestly!'

    The exasperated mother walks away as the two
    friends begin to play.

    'My Mom won't tell me anything about her,' the
    little girl says to her friend.

    'Well,' says the friend, 'all you need to do is look
    at her drivers license. It is like a report card, it
    has everything on it.'

    Later that night the little girl says to her mother,
    'I know how old you are, you are 32.'

    The mother is surprised and asks, 'How did you
    find that out?

    'I also know that you weigh 140 pounds.'

    The mother is past surprised and shocked now.
    'How in heaven's name did you find that out?'

    'And,' the little girl says triumphantly, 'I know why
    you and daddy got a divorce.'

    'Oh really?' the mother asks. 'Why?'

    'Because you got an F in sex.'


    Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. - Leo Buscaglia

  2. #2
    pc830cop's Avatar
    pc830cop is offline Just another squirrel looking for a NUT
    Verified LEO
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    Southern California
    Posts
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    sounds like my ex fiance!


    Searching for Evil and the Perfect donut (Love that book)

    "It's not who you are underneath, but what you do that defines you"
    -Batman Begins

    There are gains for all our losses
    There are balms for all our pain
    But, when youth, the dream, departs
    It takes something from our hearts
    And it never comes again

    "Captain, it is I Ensign Pulver. I just threw your damn palm tree overboard. Now, what's all this crap about no movie tonight?" -Ens Pulver in Mister Roberts

    The man who will go where his colors go, without asking who will fight a phantom foe in the jungle and mountain range, without counting, and who will suffer and die in the midst of incredible hardship, without complaint, is still what he has always been, from Imperial Rome to sceptered Britain to democratic America. He is the stuff of which legions are made. ...His pride is in his colors and his regiment, his training hard and thorough and coldly realistic, to fit him for what he must face...and his obedience is to his orders. He has been called United State Marine.
    T.R. Fehrenbach, This Kind of War

  3. #3
    KaiGywer's Avatar
    KaiGywer is offline *insert witty remark here*
    Verified LEO
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    Hahahahah, that's awesome!
    Alpha Phi Sigma Alum - Alpha Delta Chapter
    ΑΦΣ

  4. #4
    k-9max's Avatar
    k-9max is offline K9 Officer
    Verified LEO
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    Location
    Gods Country
    Posts
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    Hahahaha, Funny
    YEAH, IM THE BERRIES, AND CHERRIES IN YOUR REAR VIEW MIRROR.

    Handle every stressful situation like a dog.
    Eat it, Play with it, or piss on it, and walk away!

    As smart as man is, we haven't been able to invent a machine that can smell drugs or tell us where a person has walked, Dogs are sophisticated investigative tools!

 

 

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