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  1. #1
    k-9max's Avatar
    k-9max is offline K9 Officer
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    WHO IS JACK SCHITT?

    WHO IS JACK SCHITT


    For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt!' Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way.

    Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married Noe Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.
    In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.
    Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.
    Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.

    Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.
    The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse.


    Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.

    Now when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt,' you can correct them.


    Sincerely,

    Crock O. Schitt
    YEAH, IM THE BERRIES, AND CHERRIES IN YOUR REAR VIEW MIRROR.

    Handle every stressful situation like a dog.
    Eat it, Play with it, or piss on it, and walk away!

    As smart as man is, we haven't been able to invent a machine that can smell drugs or tell us where a person has walked, Dogs are sophisticated investigative tools!

  2. #2
    Terminator's Avatar
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    Talking

    I think I've met Bull Schitt, isn't she a member here?

  3. #3
    k-9max's Avatar
    k-9max is offline K9 Officer
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    Quote Originally Posted by Terminator View Post
    I think I've met Bull Schitt, isn't she a member here?
    ROFL, yes sir, i believe you are correct
    YEAH, IM THE BERRIES, AND CHERRIES IN YOUR REAR VIEW MIRROR.

    Handle every stressful situation like a dog.
    Eat it, Play with it, or piss on it, and walk away!

    As smart as man is, we haven't been able to invent a machine that can smell drugs or tell us where a person has walked, Dogs are sophisticated investigative tools!

  4. #4
    Ender's Avatar
    Ender is offline Three Sheets...
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    haha...an old high school friend used to wear a t-shirt with 'the story of jack schitt,' on it.

    good times. nowadays he would probably be expelled.
    --

    Ender

    "And if the band you're in starts playing different tunes, I'll see you on the dark side of the moon..."

  5. #5
    Cidp24's Avatar
    Cidp24 is offline Tempus Fugit
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    I'm glad I read this. People tell me all the time I don't know Jack Schitt. At least now I can say I know OF him.
    *************************
    "It wouldn't take much for me to up and run...
    to another life somewhere in the sun."
    *************************
    "There's something inherently wrong with having to put on a bullet-proof vest and a gun to go to work."-(An old friend)


    Any statements or opinions given in my postings or profile do not reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employer or anyone else other than me. They are my personal opinions or statements only, thereby releasing my employer , any other entity, or any other person of any liability or involvement in anything posted under the username "Cidp24" on O/R.

 

 

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