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  1. #1
    Dustoff262's Avatar
    Dustoff262 is offline Retirement date: December 29, 2019
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    What is your new name?

    We all need a little stress-reliever! This only takes a minute.

    Please don't be a bore & ruin it. Send it on to everyone you know including the person that sent it to you.

    Sometimes when you have a stressful day or week, you need some silliness to break up the day. If we are honest, we have a lot more stressful days than not.

    Here is your dose of humor...

    A. Follow the instructions to find your new name.

    B. The following is excerpted from a children's book, Captain Underpants And the Perilous Plot Professor Poopypants, by Dave Pilkey, in which the evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...So:-.....................

    1. Use the third letter of your first name to
    determine your New first name:
    a = snickle
    b = doombah
    c = goober
    d = cheesey
    e = crusty
    f = greasy
    g = dumbo
    h = farcus
    i = dorky
    j = doofus
    k = funky
    l = boobie
    m = sleezy
    n = sloopy
    o = fluffy
    p = stinky
    q = slimy
    r = dorfus
    s = snooty
    t = tootsie
    u = dipsy
    v = sneezy
    w = liver
    x = skippy
    y = dink y

    z = zippy

    2. Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name:

    a = dippin
    b = feather
    c = batty
    d = burger
    e = chicken
    f = barffy
    g = lizard
    h = waffle
    i = farkle
    j = monkey
    k = flippin
    l = fricken
    m = bubble
    n = rhino
    o = potty
    p = hamster
    q = buckle
    r = gizzard
    s = lickin
    t = snickle
    u = chuckle
    >v = pic kle
    w = hubble
    x = dingle
    y = gorilla
    z = girdle

    3. Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name:
    a = butt
    b = boob
    c = face
    d = nose
    e = hump
    f = breath
    g = pants
    h = shorts
    i = lips
    j = honker
    k = head
    l = tush
    m = chunks
    n = dunkin
    o = brains
    p = biscuits
    q = toes
    r = doodle
    s = fanny
    t = sniffer
    u = sprinkles
    v = frack
    w = squirt
    x = humperdinck
    y = hiney
    z = juice

    Thus, for example, George W. Bush's new name is: Fluffy Chucklefanny.

    Now when you SEND THIS ON...use your new name as the subject.

    And remember that .....children laugh an averag! E.g. of 14 6 times a day; adults laugh an average of 4 times a day.

    ****************************** ************

    My new name is Sleezy Gizzard-brains
    "We sleep safe in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would do us harm." -- George Orwell

  2. #2
    mack's Avatar
    mack is offline Officer Resource Offical Auctioneer
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    Sloopy Battyhump here lol

    My dad, I miss him every day.

    Originally Posted by Wolven
    Life is too short to wear unsexy underwear.


    I am a female!!!!! LMAO

    Be who you are and say what you feel.....
    Because those that matter...don't mind...
    And those that mind...don't matter

  3. #3
    Captain America's Avatar
    Captain America is offline Reed and Malloy were my FTOs
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    Crusty Chickenjuice? Sounds like a Taco Bell menu.
    SI VIS PACEM PARA BELLUM

    "It's a great life. You risk your skin catching killers and the juries turn them loose so they can come back and shoot at you again. If your honest , your poor your whole life. And , In the end , you wind up dying all alone on some dirty street. For what? For nothing. For a tin star."
    -Ex-Sheriff Martin Howe to Will Kane in "High Noon"

    Far from being a handicap to command, compassion is the measure of it. For unless one values the lives of his soldiers and is tormented by their ordeals , he is unfit to command.
    -General Omar Bradley, United States Army

    Renniger-Richards-Griswold-Owens

  4. #4
    Terminator's Avatar
    Terminator is offline BANNED
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    Snickle Wafflehump

  5. #5
    OfficerResource.com's Avatar
    OfficerResource.com is offline Site Administrator
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    dorfus pottydoodle

  6. #6
    Lazy Fed's Avatar
    Lazy Fed is offline Curmudgeon
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    farcus potty-tush
    dulce et decorum est pro patria mori


    Quote Originally Posted by Resident Smart Ass
    Life is to short not to experience Lazy Fed
    ___ ___ ___
    {o,o} {-.-} {0,0}
    |)__) |)_(| (__(|
    -"-"- -"-"- -"-"-
    O RLY?? YA RLY NO WAI!!!!

    The incoherent statements given in my posts DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency or any other person for that matter. They are MY PERSONAL DELUSIONAL FANTASIES and I accept sole responsibility as such as I am either drunk or stressed out of my mind.

  7. #7
    Just KC's Avatar
    Just KC is offline Who?......Me?
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    Dorfus Dippin-Dunkin
    **********************
    ~Karie

    "I used to care
    but now I take a pill for that"

  8. #8
    Pinki's Avatar
    Pinki is offline Sergeant
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    Doombah Fricken Butt

    *faints*

  9. #9
    Dustoff262's Avatar
    Dustoff262 is offline Retirement date: December 29, 2019
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lazy Fed View Post
    farcus potty-tush
    OMG... now thats worthy of some points!!!

    On their way! That was really hilarious, especially with the avatar you have got.. they fit perfectly together.. LMAO....
    "We sleep safe in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would do us harm." -- George Orwell

  10. #10
    ryan36002's Avatar
    ryan36002 is offline Senior Officer
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    Doofy Chucklechunks
    "You will learn more with your ears than you will your mouth!"

  11. #11
    Dustoff262's Avatar
    Dustoff262 is offline Retirement date: December 29, 2019
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    Shhh.. My wife's new name is: Sloopy Gizzard-brains. (if she only knew.. LOL)
    "We sleep safe in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would do us harm." -- George Orwell

  12. #12
    MonsterMash's Avatar
    MonsterMash is offline Proud 3%er
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    Sleazy Farkle Humperdink, at your service.
    Are you a 3%er? If you aren't, you should be.

  13. #13
    Second Chance's Avatar
    Second Chance is offline Be the last one standing
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    goober dippindoodle..................
    Swamp Mafia





    The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
    ~Edmond Burke

    Certainly there is no hunting like the hunting of man and those who have hunted armed men long enough and like it, never really care for anything else.
    ~Ernest Hemingway

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Follow me on twitter.........http://twitter.com/SecondChance122





    Disclaimer: The opinions given in my signatures DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency. They are MY PERSONAL OPINIONS and I accept sole responsibility as such.

  14. #14
    jcsdscott's Avatar
    jcsdscott is offline The short minister
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    Boobie Battybrains
    Romans 8:28-31

    "Anima Sana In Corpore Sano"

    The opinions, beliefs, and ideas expressed in this post are mine, and mine alone. They are NOT the opinions, beliefs, ideas, or policies of my Agency, Sheriff, County Board, or any member of my department.

  15. #15
    Motorwaycop's Avatar
    Motorwaycop is offline Retired Plod
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    Goober Frickentush.

    Nice!
    But I like Boobie Battybrains much more
    the sole advantage of power is that you can do more good.
    ( Baltasar Gracian )

  16. #16
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
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    Dorky Pottybrains here!




  17. #17
    scarpetta's Avatar
    scarpetta is offline Rookie
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    Dorfus Dippinsprinkles LMAO!!!

  18. #18
    Jennbeth72 is offline Banned
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    ok my sounds like a porn star on crack....sloppy dippindoodle...thanks god there is not a "r" on doodle...or I would be a sloppy dippindoodler...Yikes!!!

  19. #19
    jcsdscott's Avatar
    jcsdscott is offline The short minister
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    Quote Originally Posted by Motorwaycop View Post
    Goober Frickentush.

    Nice!
    But I like Boobie Battybrains much more
    What can I say, I'm just lucky!
    Romans 8:28-31

    "Anima Sana In Corpore Sano"

    The opinions, beliefs, and ideas expressed in this post are mine, and mine alone. They are NOT the opinions, beliefs, ideas, or policies of my Agency, Sheriff, County Board, or any member of my department.

  20. #20
    Frankenstein's Avatar
    Frankenstein is offline Officer First Class
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    Dorky Dippindunkin. I should make donuts.

 

 
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