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  1. #1
    Willowdared's Avatar
    Willowdared is offline Bendy not Breaky
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    Talking Really, I Would Rather Work!

    A guy walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check. He
    marched straight up to the counter and said, ' Hi. You know, I just HATE
    drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job.' The social worker behind
    the counter said, ' Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a
    very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful
    daughter. You'll have to drive around in his 2007 Mercedes-Benz CL, and he
    will supply all of your clothes.

    Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say but you will also have as
    part of your job assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in
    her mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive. A two-bedroom loft type
    apartment with plasma TV, stereo, bar, etc., located above the garage will
    be designated for your sole use and the salary is $200,000 a year.'



    The guy, just plain wide-eyed, said, 'You're bullshittin' me!'




    The social worker said, 'Yeah, well, you started it.
    Molly Weasley makes Chuck Norris eat his vegetables.

    Do not puff, shade, skew, tailor, firm up, stretch, massage,
    or otherwise distort statements of fact.
    FBI Special Agent Coleen Rowley

  2. #2
    TacticalII's Avatar
    TacticalII is offline Member
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  3. #3
    Terminator's Avatar
    Terminator is offline BANNED
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    That was funny.

  4. #4
    Twan007's Avatar
    Twan007 is offline The People
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    somebody catch some rep for me - apparently i have to spread some around before giving any more

    that was damn funny
    -=Twan007


    Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.

    Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.





    The opinions expressed by this poster are wholly his own, and should never be construed to even remotely be in alignment with his employer. Matter of fact, the poster will deny any knowledge of any post... this message will self-destruct in 5 seconds...

  5. #5
    mack's Avatar
    mack is offline Officer Resource Offical Auctioneer
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    Quote Originally Posted by Twan007 View Post
    somebody catch some rep for me - apparently i have to spread some around before giving any more

    that was damn funny

    Rep given, lol, that was damn funny

    My dad, I miss him every day.

    Originally Posted by Wolven
    Life is too short to wear unsexy underwear.


    I am a female!!!!! LMAO

    Be who you are and say what you feel.....
    Because those that matter...don't mind...
    And those that mind...don't matter

  6. #6
    mavriktu's Avatar
    mavriktu is offline Patrol Sgt.
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    I know someone that works at a state unemployment office,and that is about right,and I KNOW they wish they could say it.

 

 

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