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  1. #1
    Cool Breeze's Avatar
    Cool Breeze is offline 303rd Logistics
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    Drafting men over 60

    From an email sent to me by my old man (US Army Ret.)
    New Direction for the war on terrorists - Send Service Vets over 60


    I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists.. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

    For starters:

    Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

    Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep , I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

    An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-bitch.

    If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brain teaser.

    Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at, and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

    They could lighten up on the obstacle course, however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. I can hear the Drill Sgt. in the 'New army' now, 'Get down and give me .. ER ... one.' Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

    An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

    These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

    Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million pissed-off old farts with 'attitude' and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

    If nothing else, put us on border patrol.....we will have it secured the first night!

  2. #2
    Captain America's Avatar
    Captain America is online now Reed and Malloy were my FTOs
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    Outstanding !
    SI VIS PACEM PARA BELLUM

    "It's a great life. You risk your skin catching killers and the juries turn them loose so they can come back and shoot at you again. If your honest , your poor your whole life. And , In the end , you wind up dying all alone on some dirty street. For what? For nothing. For a tin star."
    -Ex-Sheriff Martin Howe to Will Kane in "High Noon"

    Far from being a handicap to command, compassion is the measure of it. For unless one values the lives of his soldiers and is tormented by their ordeals , he is unfit to command.
    -General Omar Bradley, United States Army

    Renniger-Richards-Griswold-Owens

  3. #3
    nsb22's Avatar
    nsb22 is offline Crazilicious
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    Amen.


    "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear."
    -- Ambrose Redmoon

    The views and postings of NSB22 are in no way shared or supported by NSB22's employers.

  4. #4
    Kittylynn's Avatar
    Kittylynn is offline NOT A SLUT!!!! DAMMIT!!!
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    LOL! That's great!
    It's better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you aren't!

    Adopt a virtual pet today! Check out neopets! It's fun and free. All ages play!

 

 

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