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  1. #1
    Five-0's Avatar
    Five-0 is offline Super Moderator
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    Hints for Living in Alabama

    LIVING IN ALABAMA

    THINGS I HAVE LEARNED FROM LIVING IN ALABAMA


    Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.

    There are 5,000 types of snakes on earth and 4,998 live in Alabama .

    There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Alabama , plus a
    couple no one's seen before.

    If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites.

    Onced and Twiced are words.

    It is not a shopping cart; it is a buggy.

    People actually grow and eat okra.

    'Fixinto' is one word.

    There is no such thing as 'lunch.' There is only dinner and then supper.

    Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're
    two. We do like a little tea with our sugar!

    Backwards and forwards means 'I know everything about you.'

    DJeet is actually a phrase meaning 'Did you eat?'

    You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is.
    You work until you're done or it's too dark to see.

    You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH them.

    You measure distance in minutes.

    You'll probably have to switch from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day.

    'Fix' is a verb. Example: 'I'm fixing to go to the store.'

    All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable,
    grain, insect or animal.

    You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
    unlocked.

    You carry jumper cables in your car . . . For your OWN car.

    There are only four spices: salt, pepper, Tabasco and ketchup.

    The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but
    require 6 pages for local gossip and sports.

    The first day of deer season is a national holiday.

    100 degrees Fahrenheit is 'a little warm.'

    We have four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, still Summer and Christmas.

    Going to Wal-mart is a favorite past time known as 'goin' Wal-martin' or off
    to 'Wally World.'

    A cool snap (below 70 degrees) is good pinto-bean weather.

    A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola or pop . . .. it's a Coke,
    regardless of brand or flavor. Example: 'What kinda coke you want?'

    Fried catfish is the other white meat.


    We don't need no stinking driver's Ed . . . If our mama says we can drive,
    we can drive.

    If you understand these jokes please forward them to your friends from
    Alabama (and those who just wish they were).

    EVERYONE can't be a Alabamian; it takes talent. You might say it's an art
    form or a gift from God!

    Meanwhile, fishing in Russia:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkzV5AIK8iM
    "When plunder becomes a way of life for a group of men living together in society, they create for themselves in the course of time a legal system that authorizes it and a moral code that justifies it." -- Frederic Bastiat

    "Certainly there is no hunting like the hunting of man and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never really care for anything else thereafter." Ernest Hemingway

    The opinions given in my signatures & threads DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency. They are my personal opinions only, thereby releasing my agency of any liability, or involvement in anything posted under the username "Five-0" on Officerresource.com

  2. #2
    CTR man's Avatar
    CTR man is offline Officer First Class
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    Sounds like Alabama's version of Jeff Foxworthy.


    Choose The Right. When you're doing whats right, then you have nothing to worry about.

    Not a LEO

    In memory of Sgt. Howard K. Stevenson 1965 - 2005. Ceres Police Dept.
    In memory of Robert N. Panos 1955 - 2008 Ceres Police Dept.









  3. #3
    IndianaFuzz's Avatar
    IndianaFuzz is offline Policeman Perry fan club
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    After talking with my 'Bama friends, visiting them, and hanging out with them...... I understand how true all of that stuff is!

  4. #4
    Ducky's Avatar
    Ducky is offline Enforcer General
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    Mr Ducky's from there, and we visit several times a year.

    It's all spot on. And I'm guilty of the jumper cable thing.
    \\
    ` ` ` ` < ` )___/\
    `` ` ` ` (3--(____)
    "...but to forget your duck, of course, means you're really screwed." - Gary Larson
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtN1YnoL46Q


  5. #5
    luckyme's Avatar
    luckyme is offline The bastard you love, the hero you hate
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    Looks about right to me. I still haven't figured out why anyone would want unsweet tea for any reason other than medical.

  6. #6
    Kimble's Avatar
    Kimble is offline Fact: sharks love cheeseburgers
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    Quote Originally Posted by CTR man View Post
    Sounds like Alabama's version of Jeff Foxworthy.
    Psssh! Jeff Foxworthy is GA's version of Alabama!
    "I'm the only one in this room, that I know of, professional enough carry this Glock 40." -Lee Paige, DEA (just before shooting himself in the leg)

    "America is all about speed. Hot, nasty, bad-ass speed" Eleanor Roosevelt, 1936





  7. #7
    CTR man's Avatar
    CTR man is offline Officer First Class
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    Whatever works, I know you all have something in common.


    Choose The Right. When you're doing whats right, then you have nothing to worry about.

    Not a LEO

    In memory of Sgt. Howard K. Stevenson 1965 - 2005. Ceres Police Dept.
    In memory of Robert N. Panos 1955 - 2008 Ceres Police Dept.









  8. #8
    IndianaFuzz's Avatar
    IndianaFuzz is offline Policeman Perry fan club
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kimble View Post
    Psssh! Jeff Foxworthy is GA's version of Alabama!
    If any of you all know about the cartoon "Squidbillies" on Cartoon Network's Adult Swim, I just find it funny that the cartoon is set in rural northwestern Georgia. Man, I need to get Squidbillies on DVD, that is some funny shit!

  9. #9
    snuffy2202's Avatar
    snuffy2202 is offline JUST ANOTHER TEQUILA SUNRISE
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    It sounds normal to me, Five-O!
    The strongest reason for the people to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against the tyranny of government.
    -Thomas Jefferson

    That is why our masters in Washington are so anxious to disarm us. They are not afraid of criminals. They are afraid of a populace which cannot be subdued by tyrants. Jeff Cooper'

 

 

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