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  1. #1
    irishmick's Avatar
    irishmick is offline Do not mistake my kindness for weakness.
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    The Flight Attendant

    My flight was being served by an obviously gay fight attendant, who seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.

    As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that 'Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could
    just put your trays up, that would be super.'

    On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and rather Arabic looking woman hadn't oved a muscle.

    'Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines but I asked you to raise your trazy-poo, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground.'

    She calmly turned her head and said, 'In my country, I am called a Princess and I take orders from no one.'

    To which (I swear) the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat, 'Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen, so I outrank you. Tray up, Bitch'
    --"D.B.A.D." --Me

    --Life's tough...it's tougher if you're stupid.

    --"Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped." -Elbert Hubbard

  2. #2
    garda52's Avatar
    garda52 is offline Officer First Class
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    Rep 4 dat
    Remember: if their lips are moving ... they're lying

  3. #3
    CTR man's Avatar
    CTR man is offline Officer First Class
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    I get the feeling that someone just got owned, and it wasn't the flight attendant.


    Choose The Right. When you're doing whats right, then you have nothing to worry about.

    Not a LEO

    In memory of Sgt. Howard K. Stevenson 1965 - 2005. Ceres Police Dept.
    In memory of Robert N. Panos 1955 - 2008 Ceres Police Dept.









  4. #4
    KaiGywer's Avatar
    KaiGywer is offline *insert witty remark here*
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    Good old classic Still funny

    Another one, not a joke, but more a urban myth. Probably never happened, but we'll never know...good story anyways:

    On a British Airways flight from Johannesburg, a middle-aged,
    well-off white South African lady has found herself sitting next
    to a black man. She called the cabin crew attendant over to
    complain about her seating.

    "What seems to be the problem, Madam?" asked the
    attendant.

    "Can't you see?" she said, "You've sat me next to a kafir. I
    can't possibly sit next to this disgusting human. Find me
    another seat!"

    "Please calm down, Madam." the stewardess replied. "The
    flight is very full today, but I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll
    go and check to see if we have any seats available in club or
    first class".

    The woman cocks a snooty look at the outraged black man
    beside her (not to mention many of the surrounding
    passengers). A few minutes later the stewardess returns with
    the good news, which she delivers to the lady, who cannot help
    but look at the people around her with a smug and
    self-satisfied grin.

    "Madam, unfortunately, as I suspected, economy is full. I've
    spoken to the cabin services director, and club is also full.
    However, we do have one seat in first class".

    Before the lady has a chance to answer, the stewardess
    continues: "It is most extraordinary to make this kind of
    upgrade, however, and I have had to get special permission
    from the captain. But, given the circumstances, the captain felt
    that it was outrageous that someone should be forced to sit
    next such an obnoxious person."

    With that, she turned to the black man and said: "So if you'd
    like to get your things, sir, I have your seat ready for you..."

    At which point, the surrounding passengers stood and gave a
    standing ovation while the man walked to the front of the
    plane . . .
    Alpha Phi Sigma Alum - Alpha Delta Chapter
    ΑΦΣ

  5. #5
    Hondo's Avatar
    Hondo is offline SRO
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    VERRY FUNNY!!!!
    When it comes my time to go, I hope with fervent zeal, That my merits have been proved on life's battlefield. Enough to earn me One small place of rest, Just over on the other side, Beyond the reach of death. -Ralf Grant Edens

    You know how it is Striet! Sometimes doin the right thing ain't doin the right thing -HONDO

 

 

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