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Thread: Choosing A Wife

  1. #1
    slamdunc's Avatar
    slamdunc is offline On The Beat
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    Choosing A Wife

    A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three
    likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to
    see what they do with the money.
    The first does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon gets her
    hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits and dresses up very
    nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much.

    The man was impressed.

    The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much.

    Again, the man is impressed.

    The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much.

    Obviously, the man was impressed.

    The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money he'd given her. Then, he married the one with the biggest boobs.

    Men are like that, you know.

    There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on
    Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no
    recollection of what to do with them.
    'The Art of War' teaches us to "Rely not on the likelihood of the enemy's coming, but on our own readiness to receive him"--Sun Tsu

  2. #2
    Roses's Avatar
    Roses is offline Member
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    I chuckle everytime I read this one.
    http://img455.imageshack.us/img455/1369/rosekdrosetransp9fk2eb.gif

    A Smile

    A smile cost nothing, but gives so much.

    It enriches those who receive it,
    without making poorer those who give.
    It takes but a moment, but the memory
    of it sometimes lasts forever.

    None is so rich or mighty that he
    can get along without it,
    and none is so poor but that
    he can be made rich by it.

    A smile creates happiness in the home,
    fosters goodwill in business,
    and is the countersign of friendship.

    It brings rest to the weary,
    cheer to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad,
    and it is nature's best antidote for trouble.

    Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed,
    or stolen, for it is something that is of no
    value to anyone until it is given away.

    Some people are too tired to give you a smile.
    Give them one of yours, as none needs a smile
    so much as he who has no more to give.

    - author unknown

 

 

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