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  1. #1
    Shoestring's Avatar
    Shoestring is offline Please dont check the trunk...
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    Yo' Mama So..... (JOKES)

    Okay, PPG hit a joke in another thread, I always loved Yo Mama jokes

    So lets hear them

    One of my all time fav's


    YO MAMA SO FAT, SHE JUMPED UP IN THE AIR AND GOT STUCK
    Somebody Please, what the hell is that smell?

    "The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'."

    The views, opinions, stupid off the cuff comments, mouthy, obnoxious, thoughtless, etc etc etc are not always or even some of the time the belief of my department, so bugger off!

  2. #2
    pgg's Avatar
    pgg
    pgg is offline Damnit, I'm hungry again.
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    Yo mama so fat that after I had sex I rolled over twice and was still on the bitch

  3. #3
    pgg's Avatar
    pgg
    pgg is offline Damnit, I'm hungry again.
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    Yo mama so fat she got her own zip code

  4. #4
    keith720's Avatar
    keith720 is online now Finely Aged
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    Yo Momma so fat, when she sit in a hot tub, it make gravy.
    For the morning will come. Brightly will it shine on the brave and true, kindly upon all who suffer for the cause, glorious upon the tombs of heroes. Thus will shine the dawn.

    Winston Churchill

  5. #5
    Shoestring's Avatar
    Shoestring is offline Please dont check the trunk...
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    Yo mama so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth
    Somebody Please, what the hell is that smell?

    "The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'."

    The views, opinions, stupid off the cuff comments, mouthy, obnoxious, thoughtless, etc etc etc are not always or even some of the time the belief of my department, so bugger off!

  6. #6
    Five-0's Avatar
    Five-0 is offline Super Moderator
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    You mama is so fat that when she wears read the kids all yell KOOL-AID.

    Meanwhile, fishing in Russia:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkzV5AIK8iM
    "When plunder becomes a way of life for a group of men living together in society, they create for themselves in the course of time a legal system that authorizes it and a moral code that justifies it." -- Frederic Bastiat

    "Certainly there is no hunting like the hunting of man and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never really care for anything else thereafter." Ernest Hemingway

    The opinions given in my signatures & threads DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency. They are my personal opinions only, thereby releasing my agency of any liability, or involvement in anything posted under the username "Five-0" on Officerresource.com

  7. #7
    Second Chance's Avatar
    Second Chance is offline Be the last one standing
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    Yo mama so fat, when she wears high heels, she strikes oil..................
    Swamp Mafia





    The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
    ~Edmond Burke

    Certainly there is no hunting like the hunting of man and those who have hunted armed men long enough and like it, never really care for anything else.
    ~Ernest Hemingway

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Follow me on twitter.........http://twitter.com/SecondChance122





    Disclaimer: The opinions given in my signatures DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency. They are MY PERSONAL OPINIONS and I accept sole responsibility as such.

  8. #8
    Jenna's Avatar
    Jenna is offline sheep
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    Yo Mama, I'm really happy for you and I'mma let you finish, but Papa is the best parent of all time!

  9. #9
    Captain America's Avatar
    Captain America is offline Reed and Malloy were my FTOs
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna View Post
    Yo Mama, I'm really happy for you and I'mma let you finish, but Papa is the best parent of all time!
    Kanye West is everywhere!!
    SI VIS PACEM PARA BELLUM

    "It's a great life. You risk your skin catching killers and the juries turn them loose so they can come back and shoot at you again. If your honest , your poor your whole life. And , In the end , you wind up dying all alone on some dirty street. For what? For nothing. For a tin star."
    -Ex-Sheriff Martin Howe to Will Kane in "High Noon"

    Far from being a handicap to command, compassion is the measure of it. For unless one values the lives of his soldiers and is tormented by their ordeals , he is unfit to command.
    -General Omar Bradley, United States Army

    Renniger-Richards-Griswold-Owens

  10. #10
    Captain America's Avatar
    Captain America is offline Reed and Malloy were my FTOs
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    Yo mama so ugly , they use her face as a template to make animal cookies.
    SI VIS PACEM PARA BELLUM

    "It's a great life. You risk your skin catching killers and the juries turn them loose so they can come back and shoot at you again. If your honest , your poor your whole life. And , In the end , you wind up dying all alone on some dirty street. For what? For nothing. For a tin star."
    -Ex-Sheriff Martin Howe to Will Kane in "High Noon"

    Far from being a handicap to command, compassion is the measure of it. For unless one values the lives of his soldiers and is tormented by their ordeals , he is unfit to command.
    -General Omar Bradley, United States Army

    Renniger-Richards-Griswold-Owens

  11. #11
    AGeorge's Avatar
    AGeorge is offline Rookie
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    Yo momma's so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop

    Yo momma so fat she has to iron her pants in the driveway

  12. #12
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
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    Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, when she smiles it looks like her mouth is throwing gang signs.




  13. #13
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
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    Yo mama's breath is so bad, I don't know if she needs a Tic Tac or toilet paper.


    Yo mama's so ugly her pillow cries at night.




  14. #14
    countybear's Avatar
    countybear is offline BDRT - Baby Daddy Removal Team
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    Your mama is such a slut, I had to double-park my nuts on her ass for an hour waitng for the 'now serving' sign on her back to click.

    Your mama is such a slut, hitting her in the ass reminded me of the hula hoop.

    Your mama is such a slut, the health unit dedicated a wing to her.

    Your mama's seen more Dicks than a Richard convention.

    Its nice to know your mama taught you to talk with your mouth full...

    "The American Republic will endure until the day Congress discovers that it can bribe the public with the public's money."
    - Alexis de Tocqueville, Democracy in America

    Tell me not, Sweet, I am unkind,
    That from the nunnery
    Of thy chaste breast and quiet mind
    To war and arms I fly.
    - Lovelace

    The opinions expressed by this poster are wholly his own, and should never be construed to even remotely be in representation of his employer, its agencies or assigns. In fact, they probably fail to be in alignment with the opinions of any rational human being.

  15. #15
    Second Chance's Avatar
    Second Chance is offline Be the last one standing
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    Yo mama was so ugly as a baby, they had to tie a pork chop around her neck so the puppies would play with her....................
    Swamp Mafia





    The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
    ~Edmond Burke

    Certainly there is no hunting like the hunting of man and those who have hunted armed men long enough and like it, never really care for anything else.
    ~Ernest Hemingway

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Follow me on twitter.........http://twitter.com/SecondChance122





    Disclaimer: The opinions given in my signatures DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency. They are MY PERSONAL OPINIONS and I accept sole responsibility as such.

  16. #16
    Buttercup's Avatar
    Buttercup is offline Thrives in sunshine
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    Yo mama's so ugly it looks like she got hit in the face with a big bag of "what the fuck!?!"

    Yo mama's teeth are so yellow it looks like she's been blowing the Simpsons.

    Yo mama's so ugly she could have sex in any position and it'll still be doggy style.

    Yo mama's so fat, her theme song is "We are fa-mi-ly...Burger King, McDonald's and me..."




  17. #17
    Captain America's Avatar
    Captain America is offline Reed and Malloy were my FTOs
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    Yo mama's soooo fat , she ugly.
    SI VIS PACEM PARA BELLUM

    "It's a great life. You risk your skin catching killers and the juries turn them loose so they can come back and shoot at you again. If your honest , your poor your whole life. And , In the end , you wind up dying all alone on some dirty street. For what? For nothing. For a tin star."
    -Ex-Sheriff Martin Howe to Will Kane in "High Noon"

    Far from being a handicap to command, compassion is the measure of it. For unless one values the lives of his soldiers and is tormented by their ordeals , he is unfit to command.
    -General Omar Bradley, United States Army

    Renniger-Richards-Griswold-Owens

  18. #18
    gopherpuckfan's Avatar
    gopherpuckfan is offline I'm from the government and I'm here to help
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    Yo mamma so fat, when she wore a Malcolm X shirt, a helicopter tried to land on the bitch.
    Yo momma teef so yellow, she spits butter
    Yo momma so fat, when she broke her leg, gravy came out
    Yo momma got a afro wit a chin strap.
    Yo momma got a peg leg wit a kickstand
    Yo momma so fat, when she sits around the house, she sits "around the house"!
    Yo momma like a door knob. Everyone gets a turn.
    Yo momma like a bus. Dudes climb on and off her all day.
    The views expressed in the above post are the sole opinion of the author and do not reflect any official position by the author's employer and/or municipality.

  19. #19
    Cidp24's Avatar
    Cidp24 is offline Tempus Fugit
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    Yo' mama so short you can see her feet in her drivers license photo.

    Yo' mama so stupid it took her two hours to watch 60 minutes.

    Yo' mama so stupid she took the Pepsi Challenge and chose Jif.

    Yo' mama so hairy she look like she got the Jackson 5 in a headlock.
    *************************
    "It wouldn't take much for me to up and run...
    to another life somewhere in the sun."
    *************************
    "There's something inherently wrong with having to put on a bullet-proof vest and a gun to go to work."-(An old friend)


    Any statements or opinions given in my postings or profile do not reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employer or anyone else other than me. They are my personal opinions or statements only, thereby releasing my employer , any other entity, or any other person of any liability or involvement in anything posted under the username "Cidp24" on O/R.

  20. #20
    213th's Avatar
    213th is offline Solipsist
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    Yo mama is rated "E", for Everyone
    He who has the money, signs the cheques.
    He who signs the cheques, makes the rules.
    He who makes the rules, has the power.
    He who has the power, has the money.

 

 
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