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Thread: Yo' Mama So..... (JOKES)
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10-08-09, 12:52 AM #1
Please dont check the trunk...
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Yo' Mama So..... (JOKES)
Okay, PPG hit a joke in another thread, I always loved Yo Mama jokes
So lets hear them
One of my all time fav's
YO MAMA SO FAT, SHE JUMPED UP IN THE AIR AND GOT STUCKSomebody Please, what the hell is that smell?
"The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'."
The views, opinions, stupid off the cuff comments, mouthy, obnoxious, thoughtless, etc etc etc are not always or even some of the time the belief of my department, so bugger off!
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10-08-09, 01:21 AM #2
Damnit, I'm hungry again.
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Yo mama so fat that after I had sex I rolled over twice and was still on the bitch
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10-08-09, 01:23 AM #3
Damnit, I'm hungry again.
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Yo mama so fat she got her own zip code
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10-08-09, 02:56 AM #4
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Yo Momma so fat, when she sit in a hot tub, it make gravy.
For the morning will come. Brightly will it shine on the brave and true, kindly upon all who suffer for the cause, glorious upon the tombs of heroes. Thus will shine the dawn.
Winston Churchill
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10-08-09, 03:08 AM #5
Please dont check the trunk...
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Yo mama so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth
Somebody Please, what the hell is that smell?
"The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'."
The views, opinions, stupid off the cuff comments, mouthy, obnoxious, thoughtless, etc etc etc are not always or even some of the time the belief of my department, so bugger off!
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10-08-09, 07:18 AM #6
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You mama is so fat that when she wears read the kids all yell KOOL-AID.
Meanwhile, fishing in Russia:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkzV5AIK8iM
"When plunder becomes a way of life for a group of men living together in society, they create for themselves in the course of time a legal system that authorizes it and a moral code that justifies it." -- Frederic Bastiat
"Certainly there is no hunting like the hunting of man and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never really care for anything else thereafter." Ernest Hemingway
The opinions given in my signatures & threads DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency. They are my personal opinions only, thereby releasing my agency of any liability, or involvement in anything posted under the username "Five-0" on Officerresource.com
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10-08-09, 08:24 AM #7
Be the last one standing
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Yo mama so fat, when she wears high heels, she strikes oil..................
Swamp Mafia
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
~Edmond Burke
Certainly there is no hunting like the hunting of man and those who have hunted armed men long enough and like it, never really care for anything else.
~Ernest Hemingway
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Disclaimer: The opinions given in my signatures DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency. They are MY PERSONAL OPINIONS and I accept sole responsibility as such.
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10-08-09, 08:31 AM #8
sheep
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Yo Mama, I'm really happy for you and I'mma let you finish, but Papa is the best parent of all time!
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10-08-09, 09:10 AM #9
Reed and Malloy were my FTOs
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Kanye West is everywhere!!
Originally Posted by Jenna
Yo Mama, I'm really happy for you and I'mma let you finish, but Papa is the best parent of all time!SI VIS PACEM PARA BELLUM-Ex-Sheriff Martin Howe to Will Kane in "High Noon"
"It's a great life. You risk your skin catching killers and the juries turn them loose so they can come back and shoot at you again. If your honest , your poor your whole life. And , In the end , you wind up dying all alone on some dirty street. For what? For nothing. For a tin star."
Far from being a handicap to command, compassion is the measure of it. For unless one values the lives of his soldiers and is tormented by their ordeals , he is unfit to command.
-General Omar Bradley, United States Army
Renniger-Richards-Griswold-Owens
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10-08-09, 09:13 AM #10
Reed and Malloy were my FTOs
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Yo mama so ugly , they use her face as a template to make animal cookies.
SI VIS PACEM PARA BELLUM-Ex-Sheriff Martin Howe to Will Kane in "High Noon"
"It's a great life. You risk your skin catching killers and the juries turn them loose so they can come back and shoot at you again. If your honest , your poor your whole life. And , In the end , you wind up dying all alone on some dirty street. For what? For nothing. For a tin star."
Far from being a handicap to command, compassion is the measure of it. For unless one values the lives of his soldiers and is tormented by their ordeals , he is unfit to command.
-General Omar Bradley, United States Army
Renniger-Richards-Griswold-Owens
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10-08-09, 09:19 AM #11
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Yo momma's so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop
Yo momma so fat she has to iron her pants in the driveway
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10-08-09, 01:17 PM #12
Thrives in sunshine
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Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, when she smiles it looks like her mouth is throwing gang signs.
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10-08-09, 01:20 PM #13
Thrives in sunshine
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Yo mama's breath is so bad, I don't know if she needs a Tic Tac or toilet paper.
Yo mama's so ugly her pillow cries at night.
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10-08-09, 01:31 PM #14
BDRT - Baby Daddy Removal Team
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Your mama is such a slut, I had to double-park my nuts on her ass for an hour waitng for the 'now serving' sign on her back to click.
Your mama is such a slut, hitting her in the ass reminded me of the hula hoop.
Your mama is such a slut, the health unit dedicated a wing to her.
Your mama's seen more Dicks than a Richard convention.
Its nice to know your mama taught you to talk with your mouth full...
"The American Republic will endure until the day Congress discovers that it can bribe the public with the public's money."
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Tell me not, Sweet, I am unkind,
That from the nunnery
Of thy chaste breast and quiet mind
To war and arms I fly. - Lovelace
The opinions expressed by this poster are wholly his own, and should never be construed to even remotely be in representation of his employer, its agencies or assigns. In fact, they probably fail to be in alignment with the opinions of any rational human being.
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10-08-09, 02:12 PM #15
Be the last one standing
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Yo mama was so ugly as a baby, they had to tie a pork chop around her neck so the puppies would play with her....................
Swamp Mafia
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
~Edmond Burke
Certainly there is no hunting like the hunting of man and those who have hunted armed men long enough and like it, never really care for anything else.
~Ernest Hemingway
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Follow me on twitter.........http://twitter.com/SecondChance122
Disclaimer: The opinions given in my signatures DO NOT reflect the opinions, views, policies, and/or procedures of my employing agency. They are MY PERSONAL OPINIONS and I accept sole responsibility as such.
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10-08-09, 02:25 PM #16
Thrives in sunshine
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Yo mama's so ugly it looks like she got hit in the face with a big bag of "what the fuck!?!"
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow it looks like she's been blowing the Simpsons.
Yo mama's so ugly she could have sex in any position and it'll still be doggy style.
Yo mama's so fat, her theme song is "We are fa-mi-ly...Burger King, McDonald's and me..."
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10-08-09, 02:39 PM #17
Reed and Malloy were my FTOs
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Yo mama's soooo fat , she ugly.
SI VIS PACEM PARA BELLUM-Ex-Sheriff Martin Howe to Will Kane in "High Noon"
"It's a great life. You risk your skin catching killers and the juries turn them loose so they can come back and shoot at you again. If your honest , your poor your whole life. And , In the end , you wind up dying all alone on some dirty street. For what? For nothing. For a tin star."
Far from being a handicap to command, compassion is the measure of it. For unless one values the lives of his soldiers and is tormented by their ordeals , he is unfit to command.
-General Omar Bradley, United States Army
Renniger-Richards-Griswold-Owens
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10-08-09, 04:08 PM #18
I'm from the government and I'm here to help
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Yo mamma so fat, when she wore a Malcolm X shirt, a helicopter tried to land on the bitch.
Yo momma teef so yellow, she spits butter
Yo momma so fat, when she broke her leg, gravy came out
Yo momma got a afro wit a chin strap.
Yo momma got a peg leg wit a kickstand
Yo momma so fat, when she sits around the house, she sits "around the house"!
Yo momma like a door knob. Everyone gets a turn.
Yo momma like a bus. Dudes climb on and off her all day.The views expressed in the above post are the sole opinion of the author and do not reflect any official position by the author's employer and/or municipality.
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10-08-09, 04:14 PM #19
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Yo' mama so short you can see her feet in her drivers license photo.
Yo' mama so stupid it took her two hours to watch 60 minutes.
Yo' mama so stupid she took the Pepsi Challenge and chose Jif.
Yo' mama so hairy she look like she got the Jackson 5 in a headlock.*************************"It wouldn't take much for me to up and run...to another life somewhere in the sun."
*************************"There's something inherently wrong with having to put on a bullet-proof vest and a gun to go to work."-(An old friend)
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10-08-09, 08:59 PM #20
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Yo mama is rated "E", for Everyone
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