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Thread: Good Husband

  1. #1
    Magnum440 is offline Older Than Dirt
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    Good Husband

    The Good Husband
    > Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's
    > Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks
    didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got
    from the party.
    > As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.
    > Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and
    > The first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of
    on the side table. Next to them, a single red rose!
    > Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and
    He looked around the room and sees evertthing is in perfect order,
    spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins,
    cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the
    > Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of The mirror written
    in red
    with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in
    lipstick: "Honey,
    breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you
    favorite dinner tonight.
    > I love you, darling!
    > Love, Jillian"
    > He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there Is hot breakfast,
    steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the
    > Jack asks, "Son... what happened last night?"
    > "Well, you fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in
    the hallway, and
    got that black eye when you ran into the door."
    > Confused he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect
    and so clean?
    > I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??"
    > His son replies, "Oh THAT!
    > Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your
    pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, lady, I'm married!"
    > Broken Coffee Table? $39.99
    > Hot Breakfast?$ 4.20
    > Two Aspirins?$ .38
    > Saying the right thing at the right time? PRICELESS!!!
    Facta non verba
    "The good Lord set definite limits on man's wisdom, but set no limits on his stupidity and that's not fair!" Konrad Adenauer,

  2. #2
    Wise_undergrad_08's Avatar
    Wise_undergrad_08 is offline Master Officer
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    That was great! Rep on the way!
    "A nation, as a society, forms a moral person, and every member of it is personally responsible for his society."

    -Thomas Jefferson, 1792

    Cotton candy don't get wet until it's in your mouth.

  3. #3
    Roses's Avatar
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    LOL! Another good one.

    A Smile

    A smile cost nothing, but gives so much.

    It enriches those who receive it,
    without making poorer those who give.
    It takes but a moment, but the memory
    of it sometimes lasts forever.

    None is so rich or mighty that he
    can get along without it,
    and none is so poor but that
    he can be made rich by it.

    A smile creates happiness in the home,
    fosters goodwill in business,
    and is the countersign of friendship.

    It brings rest to the weary,
    cheer to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad,
    and it is nature's best antidote for trouble.

    Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed,
    or stolen, for it is something that is of no
    value to anyone until it is given away.

    Some people are too tired to give you a smile.
    Give them one of yours, as none needs a smile
    so much as he who has no more to give.

    - author unknown



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