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  1. #1
    slamdunc's Avatar
    slamdunc is offline On The Beat
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    18 Hours to Live

    Ralph returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live. Given this prognosis, Ralph asks his wife for sex. Naturally, she agrees, and they make love.

    About six hours later, the husband goes to his wife and says, "Honey,you know I now have only 18 hours to live. Could we please do it onemore time?" Of course, the wife agrees and they do it again.

    Later, as the man gets into bed, he looks at his watch and realizes he now has only 8 hours left. He touches his wife's shoulder and asks, "honey, please...just one more time before I die?"! she says, "Of course, dear."

    And they make love for the third time. After this session, the wife rolls over & falls asleep. Ralph, however, worried about his impending death, tosses & turns until he's down to 4 more hours. He taps his wife, who rouses. "Honey, I have only 4 more hours. Do you think we could...?"
    At this point the wife sits up and says, "Listen Ralph, I have to get up in the morning. You don't."
    'The Art of War' teaches us to "Rely not on the likelihood of the enemy's coming, but on our own readiness to receive him"--Sun Tsu

  2. #2
    Wise_undergrad_08's Avatar
    Wise_undergrad_08 is offline Master Officer
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    Ouch...lol.
    "A nation, as a society, forms a moral person, and every member of it is personally responsible for his society."

    -Thomas Jefferson, 1792


    Cotton candy don't get wet until it's in your mouth.

  3. #3
    Roses's Avatar
    Roses is offline Member
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    This was funny! LOL!
    http://img455.imageshack.us/img455/1369/rosekdrosetransp9fk2eb.gif

    A Smile

    A smile cost nothing, but gives so much.

    It enriches those who receive it,
    without making poorer those who give.
    It takes but a moment, but the memory
    of it sometimes lasts forever.

    None is so rich or mighty that he
    can get along without it,
    and none is so poor but that
    he can be made rich by it.

    A smile creates happiness in the home,
    fosters goodwill in business,
    and is the countersign of friendship.

    It brings rest to the weary,
    cheer to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad,
    and it is nature's best antidote for trouble.

    Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed,
    or stolen, for it is something that is of no
    value to anyone until it is given away.

    Some people are too tired to give you a smile.
    Give them one of yours, as none needs a smile
    so much as he who has no more to give.

    - author unknown

 

 

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