RECOMMENDED TRAINING PROGRAMME FOR ALL PERSONNEL

In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity
from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained
through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T .) .

We are trying to give our employees more
S.H.I.T. than anyone else. If you feel that you
do not receive your share of S.H.I.T. , please see
your supervisor.. You will be immediately placed
at the top of the S.H.I.T. list, and our supervisors
are especially skilled at seeing that you get all
the S.H.I.T. you can handle.

Employees who don't take their S.H.I.T. seriously
will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS
(D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T.).

Those who fail to take D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T. seriously
will have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE
TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T .) .

Since our supervisors took S.H.I.T. before they
were promoted, they don't have to take S.H.I.T.
anymore, because they are all full of S.H.I.T.. already. If
you too are full of S.H.I.T. , you may be interested
in a job teaching others. We can add your name
to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of
LEADERS (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T. ) .

Thank you,
BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH
INTENSITY TRAINING
(B.I.G.S.H..I.T.)