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07-09-12, 02:47 PM #1
A COWBOY NAMED FRED
A drunken cowboy lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh Amarillo
When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the cowboy, "Sorry,
sir, but you're only allowed one seat."
The cowboy groaned but didn't budge.
The usher became more impatient:
"Sir, if you don't get up from there I'm going to have to call the manager."
Once again, the cowboy just groaned. The usher marched briskly back up the
aisle, and in a moment he returned with the manager.
Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move the cowboy, but with no
Finally they summoned the police. The Texas Ranger surveyed the situation
briefly, then asked, "All right buddy, what's your name?"
"Fred," the cowboy moaned.
"Where ya from, Fred?" asked the Ranger.
With terrible pain in his voice, and without moving a muscle, Fred replied,
"A strong man stands up for himself. A stronger man stands up for others."
The old sheriff was attending an awards dinner when a lady commented
on his wearing his sidearm. "Sheriff, I see you have your pistol. Are you
expecting trouble?" "No Ma'am. If I were expecting trouble, I would have
brought my rifle."
(just stole this one hope you don't mind)
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