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Thread: Police monkeys

  1. #1
    Tango Zulu 22's Avatar
    Tango Zulu 22 is offline Duncopperin!
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    Police monkeys

    Probably a repost but it made me smile......

    A man walks into a pet store and is looking around when he spots a
    chimpanzee in a cage marked, "$1000". The man looks a little closer and
    discovers that the chimpanzee is wearing a tie and a hat and is twirling
    a set of handcuffs around his finger. Curious, the man summons the
    shopkeeper and asks him what the deal is with this thousand-dollar monkey.

    "Sir, You have discovered our Police Officer Monkeys. This one is our
    basic Patrol version. It's got a POST Basic certification; can fire
    'Expert' with a Glock, Remington 870, or an AR15; knows the Penal Code
    and Traffic Code by heart and is up-to-date on Cultural Diversity and
    Active Shooter Response. Very good value for a thousand dollars!"

    The man is suitably impressed and moves to the next cage, which is
    occupied by a gorilla -- also wearing a hat and tie, but is gnawing on a
    pen instead of the handcuffs. The price on this one is $5000.

    Shopkeeper exclaims, "Ah, sir! You have discovered the Sergeant model!
    This one has a POST Advanced certification, is capable of training any
    other monkeys in basic firearms skills, mechanics of arrest, physical
    training, investigation and small unit tactics! It can even type! Very
    good value for five thousand, sir!"

    Impressed, the man moves to the next cage. Inside, he finds an
    orangutan, dressed in a suit and tie, holding only a coffee cup. "What
    does this one do that he's worth $12,000?" asks the man.

    The shopkeeper clears his throat, "Ah, sir, well .... we've never
    actually seen him do anything except drink coffee and play with his
    dick, but he says he's a Detective."
    A common mistake made when trying to come up with a totally foolproof design is to completely underestimate the innate ingenuity of fools.

    The last thing I want to do is hurt you but it's still there on my list of options, so are you coming quietly.........?

  2. #2
    lewisipso's Avatar
    lewisipso is offline Injustice/Indifference/In God we trust
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    R.I.P. Arielle. 08/20/2010-09/16/2012

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    pgg's Avatar
    pgg is online now Damnit, I'm hungry again.
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    I've met some of those
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    delusional, illogical liberal minority, and rabidly
    promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which
    holds forth the proposition that it is entirely
    possible to pick up a turd by the clean end!'

    A fear of weapons is a sign of retarded sexual and emotional maturity. Sigmund Freud

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    This is relevant.
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