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  1. #1
    BMBDAWG's Avatar
    BMBDAWG is offline Officer First Class
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    Houston,Tx.
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    Who says that cops don't have a sense of humor

    WHO SAYS THAT COPS DON'T HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR?

    "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new.
    They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile."

    "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth
    certificate a worthless document."

    "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

    "Can you run faster than 1,200 feet per second? In
    case you didn't know, that is the average speed of a 9
    mm bullet fired from my gun."

    "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess
    that means I can write anything I want on the ticket,
    huh?"

    "Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I
    don't think it will help. Oh ... did I mention that I
    am the shift supervisor?"

    "Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you
    not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

    "The answer to this last question will determine
    whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat
    or a dog?"

    "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place
    where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and
    step in monkey poop."

    "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife
    gets a toaster oven."

    "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

    "Just how big were those two beers?"

    "No sir we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have
    quotas but now we're allowed to write as many tickets
    as we want."

    "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good
    personal friend of yours. At least you know someone
    who can post your bail."

    "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're
    right, we don't. Sign here."



    =====
    God Bless America!

    Ric
    bmbdawg@yahoo.com
    DON'T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF

    "ATTITUDE" - I am convinced that life is 10% of what happens to me and 90% on how I react to it.

  2. #2
    Lo523's Avatar
    Lo523 is offline Master Officer
    Supporting Member Lvl 1
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    04-16-06
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    Excellent!

  3. #3
    Ivory's Avatar
    Ivory is offline Grrr I hate not working for a jail.....
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    Uh.... cat?

 

 

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