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Thread: Zen Wisdom

  1. #1
    Willowdared's Avatar
    Willowdared is offline Bendy not Breaky
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    Talking Zen Wisdom

    ZEN AND THE WISDOM OF LIFE


    Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me,
    for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much
    leave me the hell alone.

    It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your
    neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

    Sex is like air -- it's not important unless you aren't getting any.

    No one is listening until you fart.

    If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of
    car payments.

    Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
    That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away, and you have
    their shoes.

    If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

    Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish,
    and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

    If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was worth
    it.

    Don't worry--It only seems kinky the first time.

    Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes
    from bad judgment.

    There are two theories about arguing with women. Neither one works.

    Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

    Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative
    on the same night.
    Molly Weasley makes Chuck Norris eat his vegetables.

    Do not puff, shade, skew, tailor, firm up, stretch, massage,
    or otherwise distort statements of fact.
    FBI Special Agent Coleen Rowley

  2. #2
    conalabu is offline Grasshopper
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    Is it bad if I thought that this was a quiz and answered "yes, I have done that" to most of them????

  3. #3
    Ducky's Avatar
    Ducky is offline Enforcer General
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    Quote Originally Posted by conalabu
    Is it bad if I thought that this was a quiz and answered "yes, I have done that" to most of them????
    Only if you did most of them on the same day.
    \\
    ` ` ` ` < ` )___/\
    `` ` ` ` (3--(____)
    "...but to forget your duck, of course, means you're really screwed." - Gary Larson
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtN1YnoL46Q


  4. #4
    CopsRCool302 Guest
    [QUOTE=PDawg]ZEN AND THE WISDOM OF LIFE


    Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me,
    for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much
    leave me the hell alone.

    It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your
    neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

    Sex is like air -- it's not important unless you aren't getting any.

    No one is listening until you fart.

    If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of
    car payments.

    you made my day with your wisdom

  5. #5
    conalabu is offline Grasshopper
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    oh. ummm. That's a problem then.

  6. #6
    CountyFourteen's Avatar
    CountyFourteen is offline Sergeant
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    lol
    Any Post I make is my opinion only!
    I do not have the authority or the permission to post for my Sheriff's Office.



  7. #7
    Roses's Avatar
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    Good one! LOL!
    http://img455.imageshack.us/img455/1369/rosekdrosetransp9fk2eb.gif

    A Smile

    A smile cost nothing, but gives so much.

    It enriches those who receive it,
    without making poorer those who give.
    It takes but a moment, but the memory
    of it sometimes lasts forever.

    None is so rich or mighty that he
    can get along without it,
    and none is so poor but that
    he can be made rich by it.

    A smile creates happiness in the home,
    fosters goodwill in business,
    and is the countersign of friendship.

    It brings rest to the weary,
    cheer to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad,
    and it is nature's best antidote for trouble.

    Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed,
    or stolen, for it is something that is of no
    value to anyone until it is given away.

    Some people are too tired to give you a smile.
    Give them one of yours, as none needs a smile
    so much as he who has no more to give.

    - author unknown

 

 

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