Welcome to the APBWeb.
Results 1 to 5 of 5
  1. #1
    kay88's Avatar
    kay88 is offline Sergeant
    Join Date
    09-28-06
    Location
    New Ulm, MN
    Posts
    1,689
    Rep Power
    60409

    Why Men are Happier

    Why men are happier...

    -- Your last name stays put.

    -- The garage is all yours.

    -- Wedding plans take care of themselves.

    -- Chocolate is just another snack.

    -- You can be President.

    -- You can never be pregnant.

    -- You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. Actually, You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

    -- Car mechanics tell you the truth.

    -- You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

    -- Same work, more pay.

    -- Wrinkles add character.

    -- Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.

    -- The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

    -- New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

    -- One mood all the time.

    -- Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

    -- A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

    -- You can open all your own jars.

    -- You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

    -- If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

    -- Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

    -- You almost never have strap problems in public.

    -- You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

    -- Everything on your face stays its original color.

    -- The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

    -- You only have to shave your face and neck.

    -- You can play with toys all your life.

    -- Your belly usually hides your big hips.

    -- One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.

    -- You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

    -- You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.

    -- You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

    -- You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

    No wonder men are happier...


    I got this in an email from one of my cousins and thought it was funny I hope not too many of you have already seen this

    Enjoy!
    Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.
    ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

  2. #2
    1NVtrooper's Avatar
    1NVtrooper is offline Freakie Deakie
    Join Date
    10-19-06
    Location
    Nevada
    Posts
    756
    Rep Power
    21577
    awesome...and true....mostly
    In memory of Carlos Borland.

    Trooper Borland was shot and killed when he stopped a car on I-80, just outside of Lovelock, Nevada, whose driver was wanted for not paying for gasoline. Unbeknownst to Trooper Borland, the suspect had just murdered two people in Texas and the vehicle was stolen. Before stopping the vehicle Trooper Borland had requested a check on the plates, but the plates had not yet been entered into NCIC. As he approached the vehicle the man pulled out a .38 caliber handgun and shot him in the head.

    The suspect was apprehended later that day. He was convicted of Trooper Borland's murder and sentenced to death.

    Trooper Borland had served with the agency for 1 year.

    BE SAFE COURTEOUS AND PROFESSIONAL WITH ALL YOUR CONTACTS, AND ALWAYS HAVE A BACK-UP PLAN ON HOW TO KILL THEM.

    GOD CREATED COPS SO THAT FIREMEN COULD HAVE HEROS TOO!!!

  3. #3
    KaiGywer's Avatar
    KaiGywer is offline *insert witty remark here*
    Verified LEO
    Join Date
    01-02-06
    Location
    Mandan, ND
    Posts
    2,886
    Rep Power
    2764040
    Funny, because its true
    Alpha Phi Sigma Alum - Alpha Delta Chapter
    ΑΦΣ

  4. #4
    Willowdared's Avatar
    Willowdared is offline Bendy not Breaky
    Join Date
    04-26-06
    Location
    San Diego
    Posts
    6,177
    Rep Power
    1401352
    You can write your name in the snow, without the use of tools.

    Pee in the woods? Piece of cake!

    Molly Weasley makes Chuck Norris eat his vegetables.

    Do not puff, shade, skew, tailor, firm up, stretch, massage,
    or otherwise distort statements of fact.
    FBI Special Agent Coleen Rowley

  5. #5
    kay88's Avatar
    kay88 is offline Sergeant
    Join Date
    09-28-06
    Location
    New Ulm, MN
    Posts
    1,689
    Rep Power
    60409
    Quote Originally Posted by PDawg View Post
    You can write your name in the snow, without the use of tools.

    Pee in the woods? Piece of cake!

    I guess you are far better suited for making pee names in the snow than I. I commend you!
    Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.
    ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

 

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Men Are Just Happier People
    By Tony in forum Shenanigans
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 06-21-07, 06:44 PM
  2. Why Men Are Just Happier People
    By cidp24a in forum General Topics
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 03-21-07, 11:25 PM
  3. Thieves happier than police?
    By Hannibal in forum In the News
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 01-31-07, 07:18 AM

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •