AMERICAN POLICE BEAT: JULY 2017 7 I f you read APB, you are probably aware that goat calls seem to be on the rise. In Minnesota, St. Paul police recently responded to a chaotic scene involving as many as 30 goats. Apparently the City of St. Paul released 30 goats re- cently to roam inside fenced- in areas on some city prop- erty. The goats are way cheaper than landscapers and ex- terminators because they do both at the same time – eating both bugs, pests and unwanted vegetation. A little after midnight, someone in a GMC Yukon Denali sped through a stop sign and almost struck a squad car near where the goats were. Officers tried to stop the vehicle, but the driver kept going, said Steve Linders, a St. Paul police spokesman. There was a reason for that. “While pursuing the vehicle, police were informed that the Yukon Denali matched the description of a vehicle that was in Mounds Park with people attempting to either kill or kidnap the goats,” Linders said. “I don’t believe the officers knew there was a goat in the ve- hicle at that time.” After a short pursuit of about two miles, the Yu- kon’s driver lost control of the vehicle and crashed into another car parked in a driveway. All four occupants bailed out and tried to flee be- fore the Denali had even stopped. Police gave chase and ar- rested two of the suspects. It wasn’t hard to hear the goat yelling from the Yu- kon’s cargo area. The name tag on the ani- mal’s ear read “Gordy.” The animal was unharmed but it did have an extension cord around its neck – probably used as a leash by the would- be goatnappers. But it wasn’t over. When officers tried to return Gordy the goat (not to be confused with Austra- lia’s world-famous Gary the Goat) to the park where the rest of the goats were, they noticed the fence keeping the animals in had been damaged. A bunch of Gordy’s pals had simply walked out and were happily chewing and eating anything they could find. Goatpocalypse! Clare Cloyd, St. Paul Parks and Recreation spokeswom- an, said Gordy is doing well. “He was pulled from the job site for evaluation as an extra safety precaution, but was fine and eating buckthorn at the time he was removed,” Cloyd told reporters with the Pioneer Press. Grand theft Capra aegagrus hircus? Still serving and protecting: Retired Railroad Officer Gary Bright- man, of Warren, Michigan, is keeping active by helping inform children and adults about train safety through Operation Life- saver. He gives out brochures, train calendars and other items to educate the public about the need to be safe around trains and train crossings. 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