My first National Police Week (NPW) was 22 years ago, in 2003, and I was completely unprepared for the impact it would have on my life’s trajectory. I attended as a newly trained peer from my agency, not fully understanding what NPW involved or looked like, and just hoping to support others. Little did I know how much I would be helped by others. That week was the most amazing and exhausting experience of my life, fundamentally changing me as a person. I had never witnessed such incredible moments of honor and respect, nor had I ever been exposed to such profound grief and emotion.

NPW 2003 altered the course of my life and career. Inspired by the incredible families and co-workers of survivors, I soon stepped into a full-time role of peer support at my agency and eventually became the director of support services for Concerns of Police Survivors (C.O.P.S.) at NPW from 2006 to 2016. Along the way, I also became a surviving co-worker, having lost several friends to line-of-duty deaths in 2011 and 2012. The relationships and experiences I gained through NPW were vital in emotionally preparing me to handle those difficult years. If this is your first NPW, I hope to help you prepare for the events that the week brings.

Utilize the resources available during Police Week and take the opportunity to grieve with others who are on the same path as you.

One of the hardest things to explain about NPW is the profound pageantry surrounding both the Candlelight Vigil and National Peace Officers’ Memorial Service. There are sights and sounds that will forever be etched into your memory. Whether you come from a small department or a large metropolitan area, NPW is the only event where thousands of officers from across the country and the world come together to pay respect to our fallen heroes.

I truly believe that the Candlelight Vigil is something every law enforcement officer should attend at least once in their life. Amid the day-to-day chaos of being a police officer, we often lose sight of the honor that this job deserves — that the call to public service is a true sacrifice for both the officers and their families. The Candlelight Vigil is a moment where tens of thousands gather to honor the fallen, allowing you to visually grasp what the thin blue line represents. Standing shoulder to shoulder with thousands, holding a candle during a moment of silence, you will understand that the blue family is much more than you ever imagined; it’s a living and breathing force of nature where justice, honor and integrity hold immense significance.

The Memorial Service on the lawn of the U.S. Capitol is a solemn event of solidarity, where thousands of honor guards from around the world line up to pay their respects as the survivor families arrive. There is truly nothing like it, and it can be overwhelming in its beauty. My advice is to soak it all in and recognize that everyone involved is present specifically for you — the families of the fallen. While you may have already attended services and memorials for your officer back home, you have never experienced anything quite like this.

For many of you, this will be the final memorial service in your journey of grief, so embrace it and share the moment with other survivors. It is a long and emotional day, but I assure you that it is worth it.

Above all, I cannot emphasize enough the importance of attending the workshops and seminars provided by C.O.P.S. for families and co-workers. Led by some of the best counselors and mental health professionals in the world, these programs are designed to allow you to share the uniqueness of your own grief and to recognize that you are not alone in your journey. Many officers and families attending NPW often spend the time between the Candlelight Vigil and the Memorial Service sightseeing, missing out on these crucial seminars and workshops intended to help you understand and navigate your grief. Do everything you can to attend these events — they are some of the most healing moments you can experience as a survivor.

One of the most surprising aspects of my inaugural NPW was the number of families and co-workers who return year after year. I initially assumed that most people I was meeting were first-year survivors, but I quickly realized that many returning survivors come specifically to give back and help those who are newly grieving. They understand the journey because they have walked in your shoes, making it a truly humbling experience.

Many of us struggle to express our grief appropriately. I challenge you to utilize the resources available during NPW and take the opportunity to grieve with others who are on the same path as you. The support services staff are trained peers and counselors who have their own journeys of grief and are there to assist you. I encourage you to take their advice and listen to their insights and expertise.

Somewhere around 2012 or 2013, several peers and I were sitting together one night after NPW, discussing how incredible and healing the experience was. We contemplated what it would be like after our retirements to create a nonprofit organization that provided the same type of support staff year-round, rather than just one week a year, to help departments and families dealing with tragedy. This conversation sparked the idea for the Warrior’s Rest Foundation. The partnership between Warrior’s Rest and C.O.P.S. was established through NPW, and its mission is carried out every day across our country. When you visit the support services desk, be sure to learn about the resources available to you, your family and your department through C.O.P.S. and Warrior’s Rest. It is our honor and privilege to assist you.

While I understand that this is a week no one wishes to attend, I hope you recognize its value for surviving family members and co-workers. NPW was established to honor our fallen heroes, and while it fulfills that mission, it has also committed to supporting families and co-workers, ensuring that you will never have to walk alone. Our officers deserve the honor and respect bestowed upon them this week in remembrance of their sacrifice, and so do the surviving families.