The relationship between police work and officer mental health is like a dysfunctional married couple who ignore their difficulties.

Yours is a complex and dangerous job. What you encounter on the streets and in your department’s administration can lead to inner turmoil, resulting in anger, discontent and depression. Sometimes, the end game is suicide. We do not want to get to that end game.

So where does the responsibility lie to avoid such a consequence? Well, certainly with the individual and the agency. But there is one huge, unaddressed issue facing both: stigma. The agency doesn’t know how to deal with it, and the individual does not want to face it.

Police officers depend on each other to safely perform their duties. Caring for one is caring for all.

Often, an officer suffering from a mental health issue is reluctant to seek help through the department due to the stigma attached and the actions that may be taken.

Let’s face it, no law enforcement officer wants to be seen as a head case, and even worse, have their gun and badge taken away. Police officers are agents of government and, to the public, whether correctly or not, the badge and gun represent the officer’s position and authority. Taking those away may result in an even more fragile mental state for the officer and potentially create a liability for the department. There needs to be a delicate balance to meet both the department’s and the individual’s needs.

An interesting approach to creating that balance was taken in 1991 by the Port Authority Police Benevolent Association (PBA), the union representing Port Authority of New York and New Jersey police officers, when it established one of the nation’s first law enforcement union-based mental health programs.

The PBA hired Dr. Peter Killeen, a police psychotherapist and former police officer, as its stress counselor. This program has seen officers confidentially confer with Killeen and become successful with their journey toward healing without the stigma attached. “The strength of a union program is based on the issue of confidentiality, which is sacrosanct for any counseling program such as this to survive,” Killeen said.

His work does not end with the program; he is a proponent of teaching officers, particularly in the academy, about their responsibility to be aware of co-workers who may be suffering. Police officers depend on each other to safely perform their duties. Caring for one is caring for all.

Killeen believes understanding and support are the most effective tools to assist any officer going through a difficult time. “Officers helping officers is extremely valuable,” he stated.

The importance of Killeen’s “officers helping officers” approach cannot be understated. Being aware of a co-worker’s change in behavior and personality and empathizing with a co-worker dealing with internal turmoil can prove helpful.

In the early hours of September 12, 2001, as I and others returned to the station house after the death and horror of September 11th at the World Trade Center, I found a phone and, for the first time since leaving for work the day before, I called my wife. I cried during that conversation. Some days later, while I was talking with another cop, he asked me, “Do you remember what you did when you returned that day?” I told him, “Yes, I called my wife and cried.” He replied, “You cried like a baby and there’s nothing wrong with that.” We continued our conversation, with him conveying such empathy for what we went through. Some years later, that officer killed himself.

That morning, and for many, many more after, the members of my department were dealing with grief and shock from the loss of our sisters and brothers and the overwhelming loss of humanity. The officer I was speaking with obviously recognized and understood the mental trauma his fellow officers were experiencing. And yet, I missed his pain and suffering. I will always wonder if I could have helped him as he helped me.

Law enforcement professionals are trained and expected to have it all together from the moment they enter the academy. When one is suffering emotionally and their mask falls off during a moment of weakness, their thoughts could very well betray them.

Thoughts that betray? Well, is it possible that an act of suicide could be contagious? Think of it this way, when a department experiences a suicide, it affects everyone, especially the officer who is silently suffering from mental anguish. With no help or support, that officer may think his or her co-worker’s suicide was a way to end their pain and suffering. Can that thought be appealing to the suffering officer? Could that thought betray the officer? Will that thought be the contagion?

Instead of avoiding discussions on mental health and suicide among the ranks, an agency might consider complementing a union-based program with co-worker support by introducing a department-wide suicide awareness curriculum. This should include pointed discussions on officer mental health and honest efforts to cast aside the stigma of shame and fear. It is vitally important to create education and discussions on suicide awareness and mental health, starting in the academy and continuing as in-service training throughout officers’ careers.

A union, employee and agency three-pronged approach may be what is needed to get all three on the same page and, unlike the dysfunctional married couple referenced earlier, start talking. I believe the ones doing the majority of the agency’s work — the cops — have the reason, desire and ability to begin the discussion.

You are a cop; you know when something is wrong and when action must be taken. The mental health of your brothers and sisters is of utmost importance. Fruitful change always begins at the lower levels, rarely at the top. You are on the ground floor and keenly aware of the unvarnished reality of your job. You can be the change.